The Farther Shore
by Blaise
Summary: A new character, Andrea Wood, joins the League Against Voldemort and gets involved with one of the members and her past. Sequel to 'A Snake in the Grass'.
1. The Healer

**_The Farther Shore_**

**_ _**

**_tendebantque manus ripae ulterioris amore_**

**_ _**

Reaching out their hands to the further shore in longing 

(Vergil. Aeneid. 6. 314)

_ _

_Said of the living and the dead trying to reach each other across the Styx.It's impossible._

__

_You won't 'get' the title until the end, never mind.I love the quote._

This is the first part of a long story about Andrea Wood, who walked into my head one day last summer and demanded to be written about.Some of our old friends are here as well, but it is primarily a story about Andrea and – well, you'll have to wait and see.Here goes!

We open just after 'A Snake in the Grass.'

And the disclaimer:Everything that isn't mine belongs to J K Rowling and her publishers.You'll be able to tell which is which.No breach of copyright intended.

Part I – The Healer

_Dear Dr Wood,_

_ _

_First of all, allow me to congratulate you on your recent appointment, and on your fascinating and useful invention.In the light of these things, and on the advice of one of my colleagues, I would like to ask you to join the League Against Voldemort.As you will no doubt already be aware, the League is a Government-funded initiative with the aim of destroying the threat of Voldemort forever.Our members are both full and part time; I would only expect you to be a part time member, considering your other work._

I hope you will give this offer due consideration.You cannot but realise the importance of our work, and I believe your help would be very valuable.

_ _

_Yours sincerely,_

_ _

_Professor Albus Dumbledore._

_Headmaster of Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry, Head of the League Against Voldemort._

Dr Andrea Wood re-read the letter as she sat in her new office.She wondered who 'one of my colleagues' could be.Probably Minerva, who had helped her a great deal after her accident and remained in touch even now.It surprised her that Dumbledore was interested in her invention.It had happened completely by chance, and she didn't like to think about it much.

So, should she join this League?For a while she sat and thought.In her heart of hearts, she wondered if anything at all could be done about Voldemort.She had seen so many deaths, so much suffering, all caused by one man.If he was human at all.The rumours that flew around concerning him grew wilder every day.Perhaps even Professor Dumbledore, that man almost as legendary as Voldemort himself, might be unable to defeat him.

She picked up her quill and dipped it in the inkwell.

_ _

_Dear Professor Dumbledore,_

_ _

_With regret I must inform you that I shall not be able to join the League Against Voldemort._

A small bell that hung from her girdle jangled, and she sprang from her desk, glad for her thoughts to be interrupted.It only rang when there was some emergency, to summon her.She raced from the office.

In the left wing of the Halls, one of her staff, Dr Priam Pergamon, was bending over a patient with undisguised horror, two nurses wide-eyed beside him.The Halls of Healing could cope with many things, and the staff were all talented witches and wizards, but there were some things that most wizards could not do. 

'You-Know-Who attacked him … they brought him in five minutes ago … I don't know what-' gasped Dr Pergamon.Andrea cut him off with a nod.She looked at the man lying quietly, almost as if he were asleep save for the greyish hue of his skin.

'Right then,' she said in a calm voice that belied her concern.She bent down beside the man, and put a hand lightly on his chest.Half-closing her eyes, she could feel that the aura which surrounded him was thin and tattered.A line furrowed in her forehead.She took out her wand and began to perform a complicated resuscitating charm.But even as she worked, the man gave a little sigh, and his eyes turned up.

Slowly, she drew away, shaking her head.'There was nothing I could do,' she said sadly.'The curse was too strong.'She pulled the sheet over the man's face.His unseeing eyes seemed to reproach her, and she flinched a little.

She was the new head of the Halls of Healing for two reasons: her hard-learned skill in curse-breaking and potions, as well as the other areas of Healing, and for her special talent that enabled her to sense through her fingers the auras that were so important in Healing.But not even that was enough sometimes.

Dr Pergamon was looking to her for leadership.'The Ministry will have to be notified, and his family.Priam, if you could send the Minister an owl, and give me the details,' she said, steadying her voice.

'His family – his wife, I think – is in my office,' said Dr Pergamon.'His name is – was - Francis Bone.He was working against You-Know-Who for the Ministry.'His tone was both admiring and regretful.Andrea nodded slowly.

'I'll speak to her,' she said heavily.It would not be easy; it never was easy, but she had to do it.

Back in her office some time later, Andrea tried not to dwell on it.There was nothing she could have done; if she wallowed in guilt over this death, she would be less use to the Hall.Her duty was first to the living.The argument was not consoling, but she knew it was true from long years of experience.

Looking at a register, she saw that Francis Bone had worked for the League.And she was asked to become one of them, one of these undoubtedly admired people, who spent their lives in terrible danger from Voldemort.Who died, and nothing could be done for them.Who gave their lives for a cause that seemed doomed to failure.She remembered what Mrs Bone had said.He was working to protect us all.She looked down at the half-written letter on her desk, and flung it into the fire.

Then she picked up her quill and began to write again.

# Dear Professor Dumbledore,

# 

# Thank you for asking me to join the League Against Voldemort.I would be proud to become a member.Please send me the necessary details.I will work part-time, as my commitments to the Halls of Healing are great.

# 

# Yours sincerely, 

# 

# Dr Andrea Wood.

# Head of the Halls of Healing.

# 

# She folded the parchment neatly and put it in the 'external owl' tray, addressed to Hogwarts.She wondered for a moment whether it was wise of her.But she had nobody depending upon her, few ties or things to trouble her.It was the right thing to do.

# 

~

# Three days later as she flew in the dark just before dawn to Hogwarts, she was having doubts. The Pegasus' strong wings beat the air, and she stroked the winged horse's neck pensively.Perhaps she should just turn and go back.

# 'I'm not brave enough, Altair,' she said aloud.The horse snuffled comfortingly.Below her she could just make out the lights from the towering castle of Hogwarts.Without waiting for her instructions, Altair circled lower and lower, and landed gracefully on the lawn leading up to the castle. 

# Andrea sprang lightly from his back and produced an apple from in her robes.He ate it with much crunching and slobbering of apple on her worn travelling cloak.With a laugh, Andrea rubbed his forehead.

# 'Well, I never!'A booming voice behind her made her jump violently, and Altair's head went up.'Is that a Pegasus?'Now she could see the speaker, a huge man with a tangled black beard.

# 'I've never seen one of 'em so close,' he went on, in what was evidently intended to be a quieter voice.Before she could speak, the man was extending a huge hand to Altair, who sniffed him and slobbered apple all over his great overcoat.The giant chuckled.

# 'Oh, 'e's a beauty!Aren't yeh, me lovely?What's 'e called?'He looked at Andrea for the first time.

# 'Altair.Who are you?'

# 'Oh, sorry.I'm Rubeus Hagrid.Keeper of Keys and Grounds 'ere.'Ave yeh come up fer the League meetin'?'

# 'Yes, that's right.I'm Andrea Wood.'She extended a hand to the man, who all but crushed hers in his grip.

# 'Pleased ter meet yeh.If yer goin' up to the castle, can I keep an eye on Altair 'ere for yeh?'His expression was almost comical in its eagerness.

# 'That would be very kind of you,' Andrea replied after a fractional hesitation.He couldn't do Altair any harm, and if he wanted to so much….She knew Pegasi were very rare, and was quite used to the reactions of amazement and disbelief of the people who saw Altair with her.

# 'Is that the main entrance to the castle?' she asked, pointing up to the doors that were dimly visible through the half-light.

# 'That's righ'.Yeh go on up there, an' someone'll meet yeh an' show yeh up.'

# 'Great.Thank you.'Rubeus Hagrid was patting Altair's neck and crooning over him like a mother over a young child.

# Andrea went up the lawn, her shoes damp with dew.Minerva McGonagall was waiting by the door.

# 'Good morning, Andrea,' she said.'I'll show you up.You haven't been to Hogwarts before, have you?'

# 'No.'

# Minerva nodded, remembering.'Well, then, I'll show you up.'

# As they walked through endless complicated passageways, Andrea thought of something.'Was it you who recommended me for the League?'

# 'That's right.I heard about you being asked to take over the Halls of Healing, and I thought you'd be a good member, and Albus agreed with me.'

# Andrea looked with fascination at the pictures on the walls, some smiling and nodding as she passed, others fast asleep.A crash behind them made them both jump, and evil cackles of laughter filled the passage.

# 'Peeves!' shouted Minerva.'Stop it!'Looking over her shoulder, Andrea could see that one of the coats of armour that lined the passage had fallen over, and a thunderous-faced man was muttering something under his breath to the cat that snaked around his ankles.Minerva snorted, and led Andrea on.

# At last they climbed a steep spiral staircase, and Minerva opened the door at the top.Inside was an extremely cluttered office, full of papers and books.On the wall were hundreds of photos and paintings, of old headmasters and of the students who had left.Perched on the window ledge was a flame-coloured bird that Andrea, amazed, recognised as a phoenix.And standing behind the desk was Professor Dumbledore.Andrea had seen pictures of him before, of course, but never had she met him in the flesh.Now he was beaming down at her, looking very alert and awake although it was only just after dawn.

# 'Good morning, Dr Wood.Come in, take a seat.'Behind his white moustache and deeply lined face, Professor Dumbledore's eyes twinkled down at her.'I'm very pleased that you could join us.'

# He opened the door to a much larger office.There was a long table, and around it were sitting a number of people, none of whom Andrea recognised.

# 'Let me introduce our most recent member,' announced Dumbledore from behind her.'Dr Andrea Wood is the head of the Halls of Healing, the youngest person ever to take that difficult post, and a very talented witch.We are pleased to welcome her to the League.'Many pairs of eyes were turned to her.

# She smiled weakly, feeling inexplicably shy, and slipped into an empty seat.

# 'Now, let us begin.'Professor Dumbledore took the seat at the head of the table, and Minerva sat at his right hand.'Of course, you have all heard by now of the murder of Francis Bone.'Andrea tensed slightly.'Our greatest sympathies go out to Ellie and the children.'He sighed, and looked down for a moment, the twinkle gone from his eyes.'His death reminds us all of what we are trying to end.Voldemort's tyranny must not go on.You all are here because you believe this; let us remember Francis in our work.

# 'Now, Francis was working on our latest project – trying to find Voldemort's headquarters.I would like a volunteer to take over his work.'A man sitting two places down from Andrea raised his hand at once.

# 'Thank you, Sirius.'A few of the younger women at the table looked at him in concern.Looking at the man's dark good looks, Andrea was not surprised.He seemed oblivious of them, however.

# Professor Dumbledore continued to talk, reporting on the progress of some parts of the League, as Andrea scanned the faces of her new colleagues.In every pair of eyes she saw decision and strength, and she felt uncertain again.Was she really suitable for this?They all seemed so strong, so sure of themselves.

# Professor Dumbledore was coming to an end.'So, I will ask those of you already working on projects to carry on.Sirius, I'll give you the details if you hang around afterwards.And Dr Wood, I'd like a word with you as well, if you don't mind.Thank you, everyone.'

Everyone rose and began to file out of the room.Dr Wood followed Dumbledore and the man called Sirius into the cluttered office.'Right, now.Sirius, I'll just give you the file on Voldemort's possible hiding places quickly, and then you can go.Now, what have I done with it…?'He began to shift through the oceans of papers that swamped his desk.Sirius rolled his eyes and looked at Andrea.

'I'm Sirius Black,' he said, extending his hand.

'Andrea Wood.'His grip was firm, but not too strong.She smiled at him.

'You weren't at Hogwarts, were you?' he asked, measuring her up with his eyes.

'No, I – I studied at home.'

He nodded understandingly.'So, you're joining our little band of nutters, eh?Well, I hope you enjoy the ride.'

'Ah,' interrupted Professor Dumbledore, lifting up a sack of Phail's Patent Phoenix Phood and pulling out a file.'Here you go.'Sirius Black took the crumpled file and nodded.

'Thanks.I'll get started right away.'

'Wonderful.And do take care, Sirius.'

The man laughed, and went from the room.

'A very brave young man, Sirius Black,' observed Dumbledore.'Now, what shall we do with you, Dr Wood?I have a few ideas.'

'Well, I don't really know much about the whole thing,' Andrea said, rather apologetically.'What did you have in mind?I'm sure you already know what I can and can't do.'

'Hmm, well, in view of your skills with auras, I'd like to put you on the Achilles Project.'

'What's that?'

'It's our newest project – the idea of one of my more talented members.And that reminds me … yes.'Andrea looked at him with a puzzled frown, but he carried on.'Anyhow, the aim of the Achilles Project is to find Voldemort's weak points. You would be particularly useful to them, I think.'

'So long as it doesn't take too much of my time – I'm afraid that my duties to the Hall come first.'Andrea considered it important that this was understood.

'Of course they do.Well, then, if you're willing, I'll put you in touch with William Prewett – he's in charge of it.And the second thing I was going to ask you – would you take a few classes on some of the basic aspects of healing injuries and attacks by Voldemort?'He furrowed his brow and sighed.'I think it might have helped save some lives, if people had known about healing in the past.'

'Oh, that would be fine.Yes, of course I will.'Though she was shy, Andrea had always found it easy to explain and teach.

'And now for the third thing.I'm rather interested in your invention.'

Andrea winced a little.'I haven't done anything with it,' she said.'I'm rather surprised you found out about it.'

'You did write it up in the _Healer's Handbook_ and I noticed it.It is rather impressive; certainly not an area there's been much research on.'

'Oh, I wasn't researching it.I was trying to do something quite different, but – well, one of my subjects reported this effect.I certainly hadn't expected it, but I felt I ought to write it up.'She looked at him in confusion.What on earth could he want with it?

'Hmm.Well, one of the members of the League would be very interested in it.'

Andrea started violently.'What!'One of the League was – was…?She gave a little shudder.

'Oh, most people don't know.I suppose he prefers it that way.But still, the – what did you call it? – the Wolfsbane Potion would be very handy, if you could repeat it.'

Andrea took a deep breath.'I can try, if you want,' she said tonelessly.'I suppose you want it for the week before the full moon?'

'That's right.I know he'll really appreciate it.The full moon is on the last day of the month, so there's plenty of time.'

'Yes, I suppose so.If you want.'

'That would be great.Thank you, Andrea.I'll send someone over to collect it.'

She rose to leave.

As she puzzled her way back through the castle, listening to the voices of many students, she shook her head in disbelief.A werewolf!A shiver ran over her spine.But she had promised Dumbledore now.But how, how could any person working _against_ the Dark Arts be a werewolf?She thought of the faces around the table and shivered again.One of them had been a monster, and she hadn't even known.

~

'Is Remus still here?' asked Dumbledore when Andrea had gone.The room was empty, but the gargoyle on the door answered him in a bass voice.

'He's downstairs, talking to his friends.'

'Good, send him word to come up here, will you?'

He waited.About five minutes later, there was a knock on the door.

'Come in, Remus!'

He did so.

'Nearly Headless Nick said you wanted to see me?'

'That's right.There's something I need to tell you about.'

Remus stood behind the desk, feeling like he was a student again as Dumbledore smiled at him.

'Have you ever heard about the Wolfsbane Potion?'

Remus' eyes widened.'The what Potion?What does it do?'

'It will alter your transformations, so that you keep your mind.It's a very recent invention.'

'I – I didn't know about it,' Remus said, stupefied, sinking onto a chair.'What – how does it work?'

'Ah, for that you'll have to ask the inventor.I'm no Healer.The lady I introduced to the League today invented it – Dr Wood.She says she would be willing to make some for you.'

Remus sat silently for a moment.'Thank you,' he said, his voice shaking a little.'Thank you so much.' 

~

_Okay, the next part will be up fairly soon.It's called 'Wolfsbane.'I hope you liked Andrea._

_I know I'm working on more than one thing at a time; please don't get angry with me.I promise the second chapter of 'The League Against Voldemort' will come up soon as well.I just post things once I'm finished with them._

__

_Feedback, please?If you want me to reply to anything, leave your e-mail address._

_ _

_Blaise_

_30th January 2000___


	2. Wolfsbane

### The Farther Shore: Part II – Wolfsbane

### 

### 

### This will explain more about the Wolfsbane Potion: how it was invented and why.

### A little bit of violence, but not too dreadful.

### 

### Oh, and a disclaimer.Some of the characters are mine, but everything else belongs to J K Rowling. 

### 

### ~

'Andrea, there's a chap here to see you.Shall I show him up?'Becky Roberts, one of the receptionists, was standing in the doorway.Andrea glanced up from the complicated distillation devices and bubbling liquids.

'It's not ready yet,' she replied.

'Oh, he's not here to collect this, I don't think.He's called Fenris Baron.He says it's not urgent, and he'll wait if you want.'Her voice lowered conspiratorially.'He's awfully good-looking.Is he a friend?'

A shadow crossed Andrea's face.'In a manner of speaking.Where is he?'

'In the Green Room.'

'Fine, I'll come down when this is done – say about twenty minutes?'

'Okay.'Becky closed the door.

Fenris Baron, back again.Andrea could scarcely suppress a shiver.She did not want to see him, ever.

The black mixture in the small cauldron began to sizzle, and she hastily lifted it from the rack and poured in into the larger beaker.For the next few minutes her entire concentration was on the alchemical apparatus.She watched it intently, slowly stirring and adding drops from strange bottles.Then the potion was finished.She decanted it into a slender brown bottle and wrote the label._Wolfsbane_ _Potion_.Someone from the League was coming to collect it this evening.She hoped it would not be the person it was destined for.

Andrea went downstairs through the pungent-smelling corridors of the Halls of Healing, pausing to speak to a nurse who was hurrying by with a tray full of healing potions.She knew all the people who worked for her, and many of them had known her since she had been a first-year student here.They had watched her meteoric rise with approval, for Andrea truly was a gifted Healer.And so, when old Madam Officinalis had announced her retirement last month, the vote for Andrea to replace her as Head had been unanimous.

She opened the door to the Green Room apprehensively, remembering her last conversation with Fenris.He was standing at the window, looking out.When she entered, he turned.

'Hello, Andrea, darling.'He strode across the room to her in his old, confident way.

'Hello.'Her voice was unenthusiastic.

'How are you?I haven't seen much of you lately.The Halls getting on well?'

'Fine, thanks.'She wondered why Fenris was speaking as if their last conversation had not happened, as though everything was perfectly normal.

'Interested in coming out for dinner tonight?'He gave her a wide-toothed smile.

'I'm busy.'She looked away.'Sorry.'

'Oh, that's a shame.Tomorrow, then?'

Andrea took a deep breath.'Look, Fenris, I don't really want to go out to dinner with you any time.'

His eyes narrowed.Then a look of comprehension crossed his face.'Oh, Andrea, baby, are you still upset about what I told you?'His voice sounded so caring, but Andrea was not going to fall for that again.'I know I should have told you at once, but – you know, it didn't seem to matter.It doesn't change what I feel about you.'His hand wandered out and reached around her waist.

'It's not just that…' she began, backing away.

'Come on, sit down and we'll talk about it.'He sank onto the sofa, seeming quite at home.Andrea perched uncertainly beside him.

'I know you're upset, sweetheart.It must have been terribly shocking for you to find out that.'He pulled her towards him gently.'But you know I would never hurt you.'Andrea found herself sinking into his embrace.Perhaps it would be all right, perhaps she had misjudged him.'Come on, love, give me a chance.'He reached up and stroked her cheek with hot fingers.She tensed a little.His hand ran downwards.

She sprang away.'Don't touch me like that!'

Fenris stared at her.'I didn't mean …' he began lamely, but Andrea cut him off.

'It's not only that you're – that you're a werewolf, Fenris.Every time I come near you, you try the same old thing on.You sweet-talk me until I come close to you, then touch me up!Well, I'm not going to put up with it any more.Leave me alone!'

Fenris' face changed from a look of sweet concern to rage in a second.He also leapt to his feet.

'You wait!' he snarled.'I'll give you "leave me alone".You're just like the rest of them!'He started towards her, and Andrea ducked back fearfully.There was an enraged glint in his eye beyond any reason.She tried to remember what they had told her in medical school about diffusing tense situations, but nothing seemed to cover this particular instance.For a second they stared at each other.Andrea stepped back from the ferocity of his glare.

The door opened.'Is that Dr Wood?' said a new voice.Both Andrea and Fenris turned to look at the man in the doorway, and Andrea saw him glance from Fenris' face, distorted with anger, to her.'Shall I come back later?' he asked carefully.Andrea vaguely remembered his face from the meeting last week.

'No … Sirius Black, is it?'Please, don't let _him_ be the werewolf, she thought.

'That's right.Dumbledore sent me to fetch the Potion.'

'Right – yes – it's upstairs.'She took a hopeful step towards the door.

'Oh, that's right, yes, go off with him, never mind me,' snarled Fenris.Sirius Black looked at him with raised eyebrows.

'Excuse me a moment,' said Andrea, trying to steady her voice.'Fenris, I don't want you to come back.'

Ignoring Sirius Black, Fenris stood still, glaring at her.

'Is that all you have to say to me, Dr Andrea Wood?'His voice rose wildly.'Four months of stringing me along, and that's it, is it?You'll regret this, you – you – 'He lunged at her with raised fists, his eyes mad.In a second of blind terror, Andrea stood frozen.

Suddenly Sirius Black was between them, and he had pinned Fenris' arms to his sides.

'Get out!' he snapped dangerously.Fenris struggled with him for a moment, and then Sirius was pushing him to the door, disgust in his eyes.

Andrea was still trembling when he came back.'Thank you,' she gasped.He looked her over sharply.

'Here, sit down.'His arm was under hers, steering her to a chair.She buried her face in her hands, trying to recover some self-command.

'Are you – I mean – is the Potion for you?' she asked after a moment.

Sirius laughed.It was a welcome sound in the tense air of the room.'No, no, it's for one of my friends.I daresay you'll meet him in time.'Andrea took a deep breath, knowing that sooner or later she would, and hating the thought.After a moment, she recovered herself.

'I'm sorry you had to see that,' she said, standing up.'If you'll come with me, I'll give you the Potion and the instructions.'

Sirius nodded and followed her from the room, still looking concernedly at her, but too good-mannered to ask about Fenris.

'In here.'Andrea led him into the laboratory.Sirius looked in surprise at the room full of bottles and the shiny maze of glass tubes.

'Amazing.I couldn't even begin to tell you what all this is for,' he commented, eyes darting about curiously.

'This is the Wolfsbane Potion.There's enough for this month in here.'She set the dark-tinted bottle on the bench.Sirius picked it up.

'I think this really is one of the most incredible inventions I've seen.How did you make it?It's good to meet someone who doesn't hate werewolves.'

Andrea bit her lip.After Fenris, she never wanted to think about werewolves again in her life.

'It was completely by chance,' she said dully.'I was working on a Lunacy Potion, and it didn't work out quite as planned.I was going to throw it away, but one of the – the people it was tested on happened to be a – werewolf, and he reported this effect.In fact, it was the man – downstairs.'Sirius nodded understandingly.'But anyway, I felt I had to keep working on it.'

Sirius nodded.'Well, I think it's great.I know my friend appreciates it a lot.'Andrea didn't want to think about that either.

'Well, tell him to take it every evening for the week before the full moon.I think –' she reached out to look at the calendar on the wall'- yes, it's not until the end of the month.And he'll keep his mind when he transforms.'

'Great.Well, I'll take this along, then.Thank you.'

Sirius Black went from the laboratory, leaving Andrea staring at the equipment unseeingly.She was very glad to be rid of Fenris. It had felt so nice, to have someone who really seemed to care about her.So she had put up with his insalubrious habits and his lustful urges for the compliments he gave and the way he seemed to listen when she spoke.Then she had found out that he was a werewolf, when he volunteered to test her experimental potion and told her of its unexpected side effect, and the idea had filled her with horror.And now he was gone, and she felt very relieved.She hoped she would never have to deal with another werewolf again.But with this blasted invention, there didn't seem to be much hope of that.

I know this was short.The next part will be longer, and there'll be a lot more about the other characters.And the Wolfsbane Potion in action! Title – Metamorphoses.I hope you like it so far.Please review!

Thank you.

Blaise.

7th February 2000


	3. Metamorphoses

### The Farther Shore: Part III – Metamorphoses

### 

### The title is from Ovid.

### Metamorphoses is his wonderful poem, for those of you without a classical education.Read it!Ted Hughes has done a good translation.(Actually, the Amores is better, but that's beside the point.)

### 

### Disclaimer as usual.J K Rowling owns it all, except for Andrea and Altair.No breach of copyright intended.

### 

### May you gain as much pleasure from reading this story as I had in writing it.

### 

### ~ 

There was a clamour of loud bells, and Andrea looked expectantly at the mirror that hung above her desk.It clouded over, and then the troubled face of Minerva McGonagall appeared in it.

'Andrea, at last,' she said, her voice tense.'I tried earlier, but you weren't in.'

'I was in the Hall,' replied Andrea, looking concernedly at her friend.'We had an emergency.'

'Yes, well, you've got to come up to Hogwarts at once.You-Know-Who has found out about the Achilles Project, and you're in danger.Don't take any risks, don't wait around, come at once.The others are on their way already.'

Andrea caught her breath sharply.'How?We were taking every precaution.'

'We don't know.Just come here, straight away.'There was a crackle, and her image flickered.Andrea put a hand on the frame of the mirror, murmuring something, and it came back into focus.

'I'll be there as soon as I can,' she said, and broke off the connection.Then she flung something in the fire.'Cathy.Catherine Lewis,' she called.

There was a rush of green flames, and a small, dark-haired woman climbed from the heart of the fire dizzily.

'What's the matter?' she asked at once, looking at Andrea's nervous face.

'I've got to go to Hogwarts.I don't know how long I'll be.Vol – You-Know-Who is coming after me.You'll be in charge until I get back,' she said succinctly.

Catherine Lewis, who was her deputy at the Hall, looked over her shoulder automatically, and Andrea forced a smile.'I'm all right for the time being.And it'll be safe here once I'm gone.If there's another emergency, I'll come as usual.'

She picked up her wand, and leaving Cathy standing in her office, dashed up to where she had a flat at the top of the Halls.As she flung the things she would need into a bag, her mind was racing.How on earth could he have found out?She had only been to one meeting of the Achilles Project since joining the League, for the Halls had been unexpectedly busy, but from that meeting she had received an impression of intelligence and power.Again in her mind she saw the staring eyes of Francis Bone, dead at Voldemort's hand.Now that threat seemed real to her.She ran down the stairs two at a time to the back entrance.

Altair, her Pegasus, was grazing on the lawn, treading on the roses and generally causing havoc.She whistled, and he came trotting over, his tail held high, and poked his nose into her robes.Andrea vaulted easily onto his broad back, and he soared off.

'We're going to Hogwarts, Altair.'He beat the air with his wings, and they rose high above the Halls of Healing and into the sky.For a while, Andrea forgot her nervousness in the sheer joy of sitting astride a flying Pegasus.She marvelled that anyone could prefer a lifeless broomstick.

When they landed at Hogwarts, she hurried up to the great double doors that were firmly barred, and knocked.After a while, a man dressed all in black opened them.

'Why are you here?' he asked sharply.

'Minerva McGonagall told me to come.'She recognised the man suddenly as another member of the League, the very silent man who had sat at Professor Dumbledore's left hand.'I'm one of the League,' she added quickly.'I'm working on the Achilles Project.'

'Oh.Well, I suppose you should come in, then.'Rather gracelessly, he held the door open for her.'I imagine McGonagall will show you to wherever she's arranged for you.My name is Severus Snape.'

Silently, he ushered her through the corridors to a door.'You'll find McGonagall in there,' he said, and swished away.Andrea knocked uncertainly.

'Come in!'Minerva was sitting behind a desk, flipping through a pile of papers.'Oh, Andrea, good.You got here quickly.That Pegasus of yours must be fast.'

'Oh, he is.Very fast.'Here in the ancient rooms of Hogwarts, Andrea felt unaccountably shy even of Minerva.She seemed more formidable, clad in her black professor's robes, and Andrea wondered what she might be like with a class of students.

'I'm teaching in a moment, but I'll show you up quickly now.'Minerva set down her quill and blotted the page.'Is that all your stuff?Come on, then.You'll be in with me, because it's a bit crowded at the moment.'She sighed.'I tell you, I'm run off my feet with all this extra work from the League.'

Andrea made sympathetic noises, distracted by the maze of passages in the school.Minerva led her up a narrow staircase, and into an uncannily tidy set of rooms.

'There's a bed made up for you in there, and you can use the study for whatever work you've got to do.I'll leave you here now, I've got a class of fifth years.'She glanced at the clock and hastened away.

Andrea made herself comfortable in the rooms, putting her things away very neatly.She had never seen the place where Minerva lived before, but she was not surprised by its tidiness and precision.Minerva had the tidiest mind of anyone she knew.Andrea set the article she had been writing for the _Healer's Handbook_ out on the desk, and continued the work that had been interrupted earlier.

~

After dining in the Great Hall, a new experience for Andrea, who had watched the roof that echoed the sky outside with amazement, she returned to her room before the hordes of students came flooding into the corridors.She had found it a little unnerving to sit at the High Table with the Hogwarts staff and the other members of the League, and she had eaten quickly.Puzzling her way along the corridors, she could see the setting sun turning the lake a dull red and the sky purple and gold.Ahead, the passage forked, and she recognised the staircase that led up to the room she was sharing with Minerva.She climbed up, marvelling that the students could find their way around so effortlessly.There were no windows at the top, and it was very dark.

She heard a peculiar noise, like someone catching their breath, and uneven footsteps.

'Hello?'There was no response.'Is anyone there?' she repeated, wondering if she was only speaking into empty air.'Mmm…' came the answer, faintly.She raised her wand, and a glow filled the corridor, casting crooked shadows that danced as she took a step.Leaning on the wall was a figure.Andrea went over, her professional instincts alert.

'Are you all right?'

The figure half-turned, and in the dim light she recognised the pale face and grey eyes of Remus Lupin, who was working on the Achilles Project along with her, William Prewett and Lady Irene de Beale.He was resting his head against the wall, and lines of pain were etched across his skin.

'Sorry … I'll be fine … in a moment … so stupid of me …' he murmured weakly.

Andrea looked at him, frowning slightly.'What's the matter?'

'I felt faint … dizzy … thought I could get … back to my room … before ….'He closed his eyes momentarily, trying to summon his strength, and raised a hand to his forehead.

'Here, sit down.Put your head between your knees.'She put a hand on his arm, compelling him to obey.He sank down with a sigh, and sat very still.Andrea wondered what could be wrong with him.

'Well, let me have a look at you,' she said, her professional tone giving no hint of her confusion.She put down her wand.For this, at least, she did not need light.His pulse was slow and faint, and his breathing shallow.She twitched her fingers, and found that the aura around him was wavering, and very disturbed in one place on his shoulder.Pulling his robe aside – he made no protest – she saw the white lines of an old scar.She reached out her hand to it, and he flinched.Hoping she was mistaken, she looked more closely, but the marks of a bite were clear on his thin shoulder.A werewolf bite.

With a gasp, Andrea recoiled from him, breathing raggedly.So this was the one!How could Dumbledore allow him intothe school?Her instincts told her to run, to get away, anywhere but here alone with a werewolf.Memories of Fenris at his worst flooded her mind, and she turned away with a hard expression.She would make the Wolfsbane Potion if Dumbledore asked, but this was too much.No werewolf would find any help from her.

He gave a faint moan, and she shuddered, the old memories burning in her.But then she turned back as he moaned again.Compassion warred with anger and fear within her.For a moment, Andrea saw only an ill man, helpless in the dark.Driven by some impulse that she did not understand, she bent down again.His eyes flickered, and he saw her. 

'Please … got to get back … to my room … before….'His voice trailed off weakly, but his deep grey eyes did not leave her face.She swallowed hard.

'Yes, right.D'you think you can walk?'Her voice was strained.

In answer, he rose slowly and took an unsteady step.She raised her hand gingerly to support him.

'Come on, then.'

'It's just down the hall,' he breathed.

'Good.'She found herself slipping an unwilling arm around him as he lurched into her.Remembering Fenris' strong, pawing hands, her stomach gave an unpleasant jolt.He stopped outside a door, and Andrea opened it.

The sun had sunk below the hills, and the last of the warm red glow was fading.Remus Lupin began to shake violently, slumping against her.She pushed him onto the bed, touching him as little as she could manage.There he continued to shake, gasping for breath.Andrea felt ill, watching him, but she could not turn away.

Dark patches of hair appeared on his face, his shape changed subtly.He seemed to see her then.In a strangely distorted voice, he gasped, 'Leave me … not … a pretty … sight….'

Andrea stood a moment longer.Then his face changed, and for a split second he looked at her with the same violent, painful look that Fenris had once had in his eyes.Trembling almost as much as Remus, she fled from the room and along the corridor.She hesitated outside the door to the room, unwilling to face Minerva in this state.Her mind was whirling with confusion and wild fear.

Finally she went in, taking a few deep breaths.

'Andrea?' called Minerva from her room. 'What kept you?'

Andrea went into the Minerva's room, suddenly and foolishly wanting to cry.'Sorry – I was sidetracked.'

Minerva turned sharp eyes to her.'Are you all right?You look a bit upset.'

'Oh, I'm all right … I mean – there's nothing wrong,' she stuttered.Minerva's lips thinned.

'You sure?'

Andrea was silent a moment.Then she burst out, 'I don't understand!Why on earth do you allow a – a werewolf in here?' 

Minerva raised an eyebrow.'You mean Remus?He's no worse than the rest of us.Surely you can understand that.You know a bit about werewolves, don't you?What with your potion and everything?'

Andrea collapsed onto the bed beside her, flinging her hands into the air.'I didn't mean to invent it!It was an accident.I don't want to have _anything_ to do with a werewolf.'

'Andrea, calm down,' said Minerva, looking at her with a helpless expression.'What's wrong with werewolves?Admittedly, we had a few teething troubles when he came here, but it's not a problem any more.And what do you mean, you didn't want to invent the Wolfsbane Potion?It's one of the most brilliant pieces of work I've ever seen.'

Andrea put her head in her hands.'I know … I know … but you don't _understand_.'

'What don't I understand?'Minerva had been like a mother to Andrea after her parents had died, and now she felt on firmer ground, for she had often listened to her troubles in the past.But Andrea shook her head.

'I don't want to talk about it.But I – oh, Minerva, I'm so frightened of him.'

'Of Remus?There's absolutely no reason.He's one of the gentlest, most courteous people I know.He's turned out well, has young Remus.'She spoke with finality, and Andrea did not feel up to explaining the whole sorry story of Fenris to her.It had been so embarrassing, that scene, with Sirius Black watching.

'Thanks, Minerva,' she said, not feeling at all comforted.'I think I'll get some sleep.'

But Andrea did not sleep for a long time.And when she did, her dreams were haunted by Remus, but with Fenris' face, transforming into a wolf and chasing her through endless passages, always baying at her heels.She woke in the black night shivering and sweating, and it was long before she sank into a dreamless sleep.

~

In the morning, Andrea woke suddenly, disorientated.She stared blankly around the room until her memory returned.She was at Hogwarts, Voldemort was pursuing her, and there was a werewolf down the corridor.She took several deep breaths before getting up and dressing.

Impatiently, she ran a comb through her wild brown hair, trying to tame it into something suitable for a Healer.It had been just her luck, she thought, to have curly, unmanageable hair when Healers spent most of their time with it tied back severely.But she had never been able to bring herself to cut it off, though it fell to half-way down her back, for her father had loved it like that.Silly of her, really, to be so sentimental.

When she was dressed, she knew she had to go and check on her patient.Just treat it like another part of the research, she told herself.Don't think about what he is, take notes and consider the problems. 

Still, she had to speak to herself sternly as she stood outside the door before she could bring herself to knock.

'Come in,' called a faint voice.Andrea reluctantly obeyed.

Remus Lupin was lying on the bed, looking about him listlessly.His face was pale and his eyes dark-shadowed.

'Good morning,' she said with false cheerfulness.'How do you feel?'She crossed the room to him, trying to blot the image of his transformation last night from her mind.

'Rotten.'He sighed and closed his eyes for a moment.Andrea took his pulse with cold fingers, and found it slow and faint.

Opening his eyes again, he made an effort to sit up, but Andrea pushed him back again.'You need to rest today.'He shook his head, pain in his eyes.

'There's a lot of work I have to get done, and it can't wait.I can't afford to waste any time, and besides, Sna – some people – will say that I can't do a proper job because I'm a werewolf.'In his weakness and frankness, he seemed vulnerable, far less of a threatening beast, and Andrea relaxed fractionally.

He sat up again, propping himself on his elbows.'That Potion of yours has a ton of side effects, you know.'

Andrea raised an eyebrow.'Really?Fen – I hadn't been told that.Tell me what they are.'Now that she had a medical problem to consider, she felt more at ease.

He gave a hoarse laugh.'I'm not usually this hopeless, you know, even right after a transformation.Or right before it like last night.It made me much weaker than usual, and it's giving me terrible headaches.' 

Andrea frowned, wondering how this could have happened.Misinterpreting her expression, Remus said hurriedly, 'Please, don't think I'm ungrateful.Far, far from that.It is such a relief to know – to be sure I won't hurt anyone, for the first time.'She felt a glimmer of sympathy suddenly, and he smiled at her.

'Hmm … I'll have to think about it – see if I can get it any better before next month.'You'd better get used to this, she instructed herself, he's not going to stop needing that potion.'Now, if you lie there, I'll go make up a restorative for you, so you can get up.'

He nodded and rested his head on the pillow.Andrea left the room and went back to her own room down the corridor.She kindled a fire with a word and began to pour drops from her phials of ingredients into a small bowl.As she stirred it, her mind wandered.In the warm morning light, she could think more clearly, and things seemed less terrible.There was no reason, she told herself, why all werewolves should be like Fenris.After all, Remus had hardly asked to be bitten.For the first time she considered how difficult it must be, to be driven away from normal society for something that was no fault of your own.She stirred the mixture slowly until it turned clear.By the time she had decanted it into a small crystal bottle, her fear had somehow mutated to sympathy.

She returned to his room.Remus had got up and was sitting on the edge of his bed, white-faced to his lips.The ray of sunlight on his face made the contrast between his pale skin and deeply shadowed eyes stand out.

'You shouldn't have got up,' she reproached him.'Drink some of this.'She poured a little of the liquid into a tiny glass and handed it to him.As he drank, the colour returned to his face.

'Thank you.'He smiled suddenly, his sad, tired face lighting like a candle.She felt her lips return it of their own accord.'I'll leave you to get up, then,' she said after a moment's silence.'If you need anything I'm just down the corridor.'

~

When she had gone, Remus lay back for a while.He was no fool, he could see she was nervous of him.But he saw again in his mind's eye the swift, dazzling smile that had crossed her face, transforming her rather plain features almost beyond recognition.

He shook his head violently.She was not for the likes of him.No girl had ever come near him, for he had always been very shy and retiring.Besides, he could imagine all too well what they would do once he told them what he was.

Andrea Wood.He turned the syllables over in his mind, slowly.And again he saw her smile.With a groan that was not entirely caused by his weariness, he got up.

~

I hope you 'got' the title.Two metamorphoses in this story.The next part will be called 'The Achilles Project.'It should be up fairly soon.

Blaise.

_13th February 2000 ___


	4. The Achilles Project

### The Farther Shore: Part IV – The Achilles Project

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~

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_Sorry this took so long to appear; I've been away.The next part will be finished more quickly, I hope. _

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_Disclaimer:Just about everything is the property of J K Rowling._

__

~

In a circular room in the topmost tower of Hogwarts, William Prewett and Andrea were peering into the scrying ball.Remus was sitting with closed eyes, trying to maintain the spell whilst they worked, and Lady Irene de Beale was scribbling notes.William had decided they should put their forced stay at Hogwarts to good use, and so they had been working on this all morning.Finally they had set up this spell 

'Hurry up … I can't keep this spell going much longer,' Remus murmured, his knuckles white around his wand.Though Andrea had tried to make him rest after the full moon last night, he had insisted on working just as normal.

Andrea was looking very carefully into the globe of hazy mist from one side, and William watched from the other.

'There … did you see that?' he said, his voice tense.In the globe, a strange formless shadow appeared.'He's there somewhere.Hold on, Remus, if you can.'

Remus nodded silently.

'Oh!Look!'Andrea's fingers around the base of the globe twitched in response to a surge of power.'That's it!We're almost there,' she breathed, and her eyes lost their focus as she stared into the globe. 

The combined magic of the four of them was focussed on this attempt.If it worked, they would have a spying device set up in the Dark Lord's headquarters.From that, they would be able to learn a great deal more about Voldemort.It had been the work of several months to set up the conditions for the spell, and now they were almost there.

The magical field they had created suddenly wavered and shook.Remus held his breath as he struggled to maintain it.Then the scrying ball snapped black fire, and Andrea jerked her hands away as if she'd received an electric shock.The ball shattered and glass flew around the room.William leapt away, and Remus slumped back in his chair.

'What is it?' gasped Lady de Beale, dropping her quill and springing to her feet.

'Voldemort.'William needed say no more than that.Andrea turned to Remus.

'Are you all right?' she asked nervously.He raised a hand weakly to his head, breathing raggedly.

'Yes … I'm fine.Just … caught me unawares.'He took a deep breath.'How could Voldemort have done that?He must have breached the defences.'Suddenly he was on his feet, his weariness shrugged away.'He could be getting into the castle now.'

Andrea turned pale.She knew this had been a mistake.As they stared at each other, panic driving all other thoughts from their minds, a tremor shook the castle.Andrea clutched the table.

'He's doing something somewhere in the castle,' said Lady Irene in a taut voice.'Was it because of our spell?'

'I don't know,' said William.'I hope not.'

Remus looked up at the picture of the castle that hung on the wall, and muttered something under his breath.He examined it, tapping the frame with his wand.

'Minerva's classroom,' he said abruptly.'Whatever's happened, that's where.'Andrea saw his face was tense.'I'm going down to have a look.'

'I'll come with you.'Andrea followed Remus out of the room and running through the castle, her hair prickling at the dark shadow that filled the air.Surely Minerva would be all right.

As suddenly as it had come, the miasma lifted, and the atmosphere seemed less oppressive.

'He's gone,' Andrea said unnecessarily.Remus nodded and came to a halt outside a door.His face was pale.He flung the door open, and dashed in.

Inside, all was turmoil.The room was full of students, some sitting at their desks speaking rapidly in alarmed voices, and a crowd of others was circling around the desk.Every head turned as they entered.

'Return to your seats,' said Remus in a surprisingly commanding voice.Andrea went straight to see what they were looking at, and gasped.On the floor behind the desk, lying motionless and ashen-faced, was Minerva.

For a second, Andrea simply stared, horror-struck.How could anything have happened to Minerva, one of the most powerful witches alive?Then she dropped to her knees beside her, and felt feverishly for a pulse, for her life-signs, for anything.She let out her breath in a soft hiss when her questing fingers found a slow, feeble pulse in her neck.

'Minerva?'There was no response.

'Is she – alive?' asked Remus, who was bending over her shoulder.

Andrea nodded, glancing back at him.'Yes – but I don't know what – I can't tell what's wrong with her.'She looked at Minerva more calmly.There was not a mark on her, nothing to show for the attack she had sustained, but her aura was fading.Although Voldemort had now departed, something was slowly draining her life away.She could feel the malevolence beating against her mind.

'What happened?' she asked of the world at large, standing up for a moment.

All the students began to talk at once.Remus looked sternly at them.

'Only one of you.Yes, go on.'He gestured at a prim-faced girl sitting at the front of the classroom.

The girl stood up, looking both self-important and worried.

'Well, we were making notes, and Professor McGonagall was demonstrating how to turn a knitting needle into a fork, and…'

_The class had been well behaved although it was nearing lunch hour, for Minerva always had complete control of her classes.They were finishing off a topic, and Minerva had explained the procedure to them in detail.She had just finished with this, and was about to demonstrate it one more time.She raised her wand, and as she began the spell, sparks shot from the end.Minerva had looked startled, and then her hand trembled.The wand flew up in the air, still sparking like a live wire.The class gaped, whispering to each other, 'What's she doing?'Then a black jet shot out in her face as she raised her hands feebly to defend herself.There was a crash of thunder, and the room felt very cold all of a sudden.Minerva gave a dreadful scream, staggered back and collapsed on the floor.A few red sparks flickered over her, and then the wand fell beside her.The class were horrified; they crowded around her, but she did not move or respond._

'… and then you came in,' the girl finished.Andrea reached out to pick up the wand that lay beside Minerva.Her fingers tingled.She dropped it as it burned her hand.

At that moment, the door swung open, and Professor Dumbledore entered.

'Oh, Remus, good.And Andrea.'His eyes flickered around the room.'Is Minerva all right?'

Remus and Andrea looked at each other.'No.'

Moving more quickly than would have been expected from such an old man, Professor Dumbledore crossed the room and knelt down.The students watched raptly.

'It's the wand,' he said almost at once.Andrea nodded.She could feel it now, draining Minerva of her strength.He picked it up, and winced as it burned in his hand, but did not drop it.Instead, he held it very firmly, and spoke words than Andrea did not understand.With hyper-sensitive fingers, she could tell that it had stopped harming Minerva. She let out a sigh of relief.

Her eyes still fixed to her mentor's face, she said, 'She won't get any worse now.But I think the students should leave.'

Dumbledore nodded, and Andrea could hear Remus speaking calmly to the class.As they left the room, two more people came in.

'What's going on?' demanded the terse voice of Severus Snape.Andrea raised her head, and saw him staring accusingly at Remus.She half-heard his hurried explanations.Behind Snape another woman entered, whom she recognised as the matron.She hurried over to where Dumbledore stood.

'Oh, Dr Wood, you're already here.Good.Will she be all right?'

Andrea's hands were moving in a shielding spell around Minerva, and she did not speak for a moment.Madam Pomfrey watched in amazement, beginning to understand why such a young woman was head of the Halls of Healing. 

Andrea finished the spell, and said, 'She won't get any worse now.But I don't know…' her voice trailed off.

'Why don't you bring her up to the Infirmary?' suggested Madam Pomfrey.

'Yes, right.'Eager to be of use, Madam Pomfrey conjured a stretcher, and helped Andrea lift the woman onto it.Professor Dumbledore had been watching them intently.Now he bent down and rested a hand on Minerva's forehead.A look of concern crossed his face, but he said nothing.

'What about Hogwarts?' asked Snape with a fleeting glance at Minerva's face.'The defences …?'

'They're fine.I repaired them first of all, that's why Remus and Andrea got here before me.'

Andrea lifted the stretcher with a wave of her wand.'Well, we'd best get to the Infirmary.'She had no hesitation in taking control in a medical emergency, despite her normal shyness.Madam Pomfrey led her up through the castle, leaving the others standing talking in the classroom.In a few words, Andrea explained to her what had happened.

'But … how could You-Know-Who have channelled an attack through her _wand_?' gasped Madam Pomfrey.'That's impossible.'

'Evidently not.'Andrea was still running through the lengthy pharmacopoeia she held in her mind, searching for something that would help Minerva, but she came up with no answer.

'In here,' said Madam Pomfrey, still sounding flustered.She led Andrea and the stretcher into the quiet Infirmary.'There's a side room where she can go.It's shielded from Black Magic.'

'Good.'Andrea looked appraisingly at the shielding spells.'She'll be all right in here, I think.You've done a good job.'

Madam Pomfrey looked pleased.The inner room was small and dimly lit.Carefully, Andrea moved Minerva from the stretcher to the bed, and made her as comfortable as she could.Madam Pomfrey bustled about straightening the furniture and clearing off the shelf by the door.

'Is there anything you'll need?' she asked when she was done.Andrea hesitated.She had no real idea of what to do for Minerva.

'No, I can summon whatever I want from the Halls.'

'Well, there's a still-room through there where you can mix things up, and my stores, if you do need something.'A bell rang outside.'Excuse me.'She bustled away to see who was there, leaving Andrea with Minerva.

She lay on the bed utterly still and her face was white.Andrea winced a little at the expression of horror her face was wearing.How, how could the Dark Lord have attacked her?She who was one of the most powerful witches around?Andrea forced herself to concentrate.She reached out and felt for the aura around Minerva.With careful movements of her hands, she began to strengthen it.

After almost an hour of intense concentration and effort, the aura around Minerva was strong enough for her to leave her alone.Andrea had no idea what else to do.It was some kind of curse or intensely powerful hex that had left her in a coma, and none of the standard methods for lifting curses had taken any effect.

Dumbledore came in quietly.

'How is she?'

Andrea looked up hopefully.Perhaps he would have a solution.'No better, but no worse,' she said.

With a heavy step, Dumbledore went to look at her. He laid a wrinkled hand on her forehead, and murmured something.Minerva did not respond.He sighed.

'If there's anything that can be done for her, I don't know what it is.'

Andrea drew in her breath sharply.If even Professor Dumbledore didn't know what could be done, what hope was there that she would be able to cure her?

'Still, there's always hope,' he continued.'The curse may wear off, or perhaps we'll think of something.But I don't think it would be wise for you to take her up to the Halls, if you were considering it.Here is safest from further attack.'

'Yes, of course.'

'You've done a good job on her aura,' he observed.'We're lucky you were here.'

Andrea said nothing for a moment as she straightened the sheets.'What was Vol - Voldemort doing with her wand?' she asked after a moment, stuttering nervously over the name.

'It was a powerful Dark Curse.He channelled it through her wand, somehow.It's safe now, I've cancelled the spell he used, but it wasn't easy.She should be able to use her wand as normal when she recovers, though.'

_'When she recovers,'_ Andrea thought._More like 'if.'_

'Good,' she said aloud.

'Until then I'll have to do something about her classes, I suppose.And Gryffindor.Hmm…'He looked pensively at Andrea for a moment, and then smiled.'Well, if you've finished here you may as well go and help Remus and the others with the Achilles Project.Irene tells me you were nearly there when Voldemort chose to interfere.They'll need your help.Poppy will keep an eye on Minerva.'

'Right.'With a final glance at Minerva, Andrea left the room.

Up in the tower,she found Lady Irene and William Prewett trying to salvage what they could of the spell.As soon as she entered, they both asked, 'What happened?'

Andrea took a deep breath, and began to explain.As she spoke, a look of horror crossed both faces.When she came to the end, they were silent.

'Will she be all right?' asked William slowly.

'I hope so.'Andrea looked around at the shattered glass that was neatly swept into a pile, and at the debris from the spell.'Do you think it was because of us that he attacked now?'

Lady Irene's eyes narrowed a little.'I imagine so.We were getting very close.I think that was intended to be a distraction for us.It certainly worked.'She looked at Andrea's face.'But don't fall into the trap of blaming yourself for Minerva's attack,' she added.'We were all doing our best.'

William had picked up one of the charts.'Actually, I don't think we've lost that much.Look at this.'He brandished the chart under their noses.

Lady Irene nodded slowly.'That's good.'Andrea couldn't quite see what they were interested in, and she said as much.

'Oh, but look here.'William pointed with the tip of his wand at the chart.'That's the trace Voldemort left on the magical fields.And look at this.'Andrea nodded.'You see?'

'So… we can use it to find out where he came from?'

'That's right.Black will find this interesting – you know that he's working on the exact location of Voldemort's stronghold.It's not what we were intending to do, but it's certainly useful.'

The door opened, and Remus came in.He looked unexpectedly cheerful.

'Dumbledore's asked me to cover Minerva's classes until she's better,' he said.

They all turned to look at him.'Oh … that's good,' said Lady Irene, working a spell to clear up the glass.

'Transfiguration?I didn't think that was your area?' asked William thoughtfully.

'No, it's not.But I can probably cope with school work anyway.'He smiled to himself.'I've done a fair bit of Transfiguration in the past.'He met Andrea's eye.'How is Minerva?Dumbledore only told me that she won't be better for a while.'

Andrea gave a sigh.'No, I don't imagine she'll recover for some time.The curse is very unusual, and equally strong.It's amazing she survived at all.'

Remus' expression was serious, but he said nothing.

'Well, we may as well see what we can get done,' said William at length.They all took up their wands and began to discuss the problem facing them.

~

In the evening, Andrea was swamped with enquires after Minerva.A number of the students had recognised her as the Healer, and she was approached by at least twenty different people about the attack.Finally she fled back to the Infirmary to escape their worried faces and probing questions.Madam Pomfrey was thankfully occupied elsewhere, and Andrea was alone in the little room where Minerva lay.She paced up and down, her mind racing around in circles.But she could think of nothing to do, and after a while she returned to her room to try and sleep.

When she awoke, she was sure that she had known the solution, in her dream.But as soon as she opened her eyes, the half-remembered dream melted away like snow in the sun.She sighed heavily.It would come back.If there had been anything at all.She looked around at the room miserably, and pulled on her riding cloak.Perhaps it would help if she went out into the fresh air.

Riding Altair cheered Andrea up immensely.As they soared above the amazed students practicing Quidditch on the pitch, and rose above the Forest, she felt much better, although it was a chilly day and the wind bit into her cloak.It was with reluctance that she returned to the school and left Altair to his own devices.

She climbed the stairs to the Infirmary.Madam Pomfrey greeted her as she entered.

'Have you had any further thoughts about Minerva?'

Slowly, Andrea shook her head.

'Well, never mind,' said Madam Pomfrey, but her face showed her disappointment.'It'll come to you, I'm sure.I was looking in my textbooks last night, but there isn't anything about this type of attack.'

'No, there wouldn't be,' replied Andrea.'It's almost unknown.I can't think of any other recorded incident, at least in peace-time, when anybody was attacked with their own wand.'She opened the door to Minerva's room.

There was no perceptible change since last night.Andrea sat on the side of her bed and stared into her still face, wondering what the answer might be.She ran through all the routine checks again, but nothing was different.There was no clue to be found here.

~

In the corridor as she went downstairs too early for supper, a gaggle of young girls stopped her.

'Please, Dr Wood, can you tell us when Professor McGonagall's going to be better?' asked one.

Andrea frowned.'I'm afraid I can't discuss it,' she said.'It's confidential medical information, and I'm not permitted to talk about such things.'Her tone was final, and they dared not question her further as her eyes flashed with irritation.

She went into Minerva's classroom, wondering if there was anything to be found there.Remus was sitting behind the desk, correcting a heap of papers with tired eyes.

'Oh, Andrea,' he said, looking up startled.'Good to see you.How's Minerva?'

'Don't ask,' sighed Andrea.'The entire school is pestering me about her.She's no better, and I don't know what to do.'She looked around the room as if hoping for the solution to be written on the wall.Remus looked sympathetic.

'I thought I knew – I had a dream and I was sure of the answer, but then I woke up.And I can't remember it.'She paced over to the window restlessly.'It's driving me crazy.I feel so useless, looking at her, and I can't think what I can do…'

Remus got up wearily and joined her at the window.

'It'll come back to you, try not to worry about it.'He leaned on the ledge with a sigh.Andrea looked at him and bit her lip.

'Oh, Remus, I'm sorry,' she said miserably.'Here you are worn out, and all I can do is moan about my troubles.'She was no good as a Healer, she thought.First Minerva, and now Remus, she couldn't seem to get anything right today.She flicked her wand, and a chair appeared behind him.

'Sit down.'He was only too glad to obey.'You really shouldn't be working so hard.'

'Oh, I'm all right,' he protested, pale-faced.'And I love the teaching already.It's wonderful.'His eyes became animated.

Andrea smiled.She was beginning to forget what Remus was when she talked to him, and when she remembered, it was less of a jolt.It surprised her that she could get used to him so quickly.

She looked around the classroom again.Minerva's wand still lay on the desk, and she winced a little.Surely, surely she would be able to remember what she had thought of.It was the only hope.But what if there was nothing to remember?As if he had read her mind, Remus said, 'It'll be all right, Andrea.Don't worry.'

Andrea looked at him unconvinced.

~

Remus cleared away a sheaf of papers and began to prepare his lessons for tomorrow.Today was his sixth day of teaching, and he still loved it, even the tedious marking.But his sixth day of teaching also meant the sixth day since Professor McGonagall had been attacked, he told himself.Still there was no change; she was sunk in a deep coma.Remus turned the pages of a book with a frown.After a while he sat back and looked out the window at the distant hills, smiling to himself.He did not hear the door open.

'Dumbledore told me I'd find you here.'Sirius Black strode into the room, seeming to fill it.'Hard at work, I see.'

'Oh – Sirius – what are you doing here?'His reverie broken, he looked at his friend.

'League business.I'm getting closer to Voldemort's headquarters.I hear you've had troubles here.Is it true that Voldemort attacked McGonagall last Tuesday, and she's in a coma?'

'Yes, it's true.It's not been easy these past few days.But Andrea's taking care of her, and I'm sure it will be all right.'

'Andrea?'

'Dr Wood.The new member of the League, you know.She's staying here as well, and she's a brilliant Healer.'

'Oh, yes, I remember.'He looked at Remus with narrowed eyes.'And a rather pretty one too.'

Remus said nothing, but his face betrayed him.

'Don't you think so, Remus?'

He looked at the books in confusion.Finally he said, 'Oh God, yes, of course, you're right, Sirius.But what can I do?She'd never want to have anything to do with a werewolf, and I don't blame her.'

For a moment, Sirius looked as if he didn't quite know what to say.Then he sat on the side of Remus' desk, sending papers flying.

'Don't be silly.Any woman would be lucky to catch you.'He waved his arms expansively, trying to make Remus smile.'What more could she want?'

Remus only sighed.'A lot.Someone she doesn't have to hide from once a month, someone who can get a normal job and take care of her, someone – anyone – who isn't a werewolf.'He shook his head.'Anyway, I'll be all right, I guess.'

Sirius grinned.'You'll be more than all right, Moony, believe me.Hey, does this Potion thing mean that we won't be going on any more midnight adventures?'

'We haven't exactly had much time for them recently anyway.Not with James so wrapped up with his Lily.'A wistful look crossed his face.'Lucky James.'

'Well, they were made for each other.'Sirius smiled appreciatively.'Why don't you come down for supper?There's no sense sitting here staring out the window.I'm starving.'

'Right.'Remus followed Sirius from the room.

Around the High Table, the emptiness where Minerva usually sat on Dumbledore's right was still felt.Sirius winked at Remus and steered him towards a seat opposite Andrea.He took the chair beside Remus.

'Evening,' he said, not to anyone in particular. 

'Hello,' replied Andrea.'Sirius Black, isn't it?You're not one of the faculty as well, are you?'

'God, no.I'm here on business for the League.I'd be useless as a teacher.Not like Remus here.'

'Hmm, yes, are you still enjoying it, then?' she said, turning to Remus.Sirius smiled to himself.

'Definitely.I don't know when I've liked any work so much.It's a shame it's under such circumstances.'His eye fell on Minerva's chair.

Andrea sighed.'I tell you, Remus, I still haven't a clue what I can do for her.Last night was the same as well, I thought I knew, and then I didn't.It's going to drive me crazy.And then I worry that I'm just imagining it, and there's no cure.'She took a deep breath.'Still, perhaps time will sort it out.I shouldn't worry you with these things.'

She picked at her supper, and Remus took the opportunity to look at her.There was a weary expression on her face, and her white cloak was askew.

'It's silly of me to talk about my work so much,' she said.'What kind of League business brings you here, then?'She looked back at Sirius.'William Prewett had a few things we found from the Achilles Project he thought you should know.Did he ever mention them to you?'

Remus listened to the sound of her voice as she talked to Sirius, and to the other people around them, about the League and Hogwarts and the news of the latest attack on the French _Bureau Magique_.The meal was over all too quickly, and everyone rose and left in different directions.

~

Andrea went up to the Infirmary.In the side ward, all was very still.Even the slow rise and fall of the blankets over Minerva was barely noticeable.Andrea too was still, standing at the window staring into the empty sky, grey with cloud.She had tried everything, tried it over and over again.Nothing worked.Not even Dumbledore knew what could be done for her.He had identified the curse she had been put under, but that was no help.She didn't even have to look at Minerva's pallid face, she saw it in her mind all day long.And she knew of nothing she could do.

TO BE CONTINUED…

The next part will be called 'Flower of Venus.'Hopefully it'll be finished soon.

Blaise.

2nd March 2000

_ _

_ _


	5. Flower of Venus

#### The Farther Shore - Part V: Flower of Venus 

#### 

#### Warning: this is very long.Read when you have plenty of time.

#### Everything that is indented is flashback.

#### 

#### Standard disclaimers apply.

#### 

#### I've made some changes to the scenes at the end.

#### 

#### ~

A word, a phrase, drifted across Andrea's sleeping mind.A voice, heard long ago.Her eyelids flickered open.Understanding crystallised in her thoughts, and she got up with a jump.She knew at once what she had to do.Her fingers awkward with impatience, she pulled on some robes and scraped her hair out of her eyes.It was still full dark outside, and the stars shone crisp and bright._Good_, she thought.She hastened through down to the Infirmary and into the side chamber where Minerva lay.

Remus was sitting out the watch beside her bed.He swung around when she entered.

'Andrea?What is it?Is there a problem?'

'I know what to do, Remus, I've remembered.'Her voice was a little breathless with excitement.

'Excellent.I knew you would in time.'He stood up.'Can I be of any help?'

Andrea was making the routine checks on Minerva as he spoke, but as usual she found no change.'It would be good to have someone to come with me,' she began uncertainly.

'Go with you?Where?'

'Glastonbury Tor,' said Andrea.'The _flora Veneris_ grows there.It'll cure her.'

'The what flower?'

'_Flora Veneris_.I'll explain in a bit, okay.We've got to go quickly.If you're coming, you'd better put on something warm.It's chilly out there.Can you ride a Pegasus?'

'I'll try.'Remus reached out with his wand and conjured up his warmest cloak.

'Come on, then.'

They hurried down the stairs to a side entrance.

'I used to sneak out here when I was a student here,' said Remus reminiscently.'Did you ever do that?'

'I never went to Hogwarts,' replied Andrea.'I couldn't come.'

'Why not?' Remus asked curiously.'I mean – you're more than powerful enough.'

'Oh, I was asked to come.But there was a fire, and I … well, it's a long story.'She whistled, and heard Altair's answering nicker as he came trotting towards her.

'It'll be better if you sit behind me.You might find it a bit nerve-racking, but hold on to me, and you'll be fine.'Andrea swung herself onto the horse's broad back.Remus took a tentative step towards him, and Altair laid his ears flat back and kicked out.Remus only just dodged in time.

'Stop that!' said Andrea sharply, slapping his neck.

Remus knew at once why Altair did not like him.'He can tell what I am,' he said sadly.

'That's no excuse.He's not a skittish colt any more.Altair, stand.'She rested her hand on the horse's neck, and murmured reassuring words, nonsense syllables that seemed to calm the horse.'Now, get on slowly.That's it.'Although Altair laid his ears back again, he stood still for Remus to mount.He clambered on behind Andrea.'Hold on round my waist,' she said, and Remus obeyed.

'Okay, Altair, we're going to Glastonbury Tor.'He sprang into the air, and Andrea felt Remus clutch her in panic.She chuckled softly.'It's all right, Remus, he won't let you fall.'

As they lifted into the night, Andrea's smile grew wider.She had begun to feel trammelled in the castle, despite its magnificence.But now, with nothing around her but the cold air and the stars, everything felt much better.

'So, what are these _flora Veneris_ things, then?' asked Remus, a slight tremor in his voice.'Doesn't that mean Flower of Venus?'

'That's right.They only blossom when Venus is high in the sky, at night.It's the most powerful herb against the Dark.'

'I didn't know that.And is Venus up tonight?'

'We wouldn't be going if she weren't.I saw her last night, about two hours before dawn, so she'll be up tonight as well.'They both looked at the sky.The moon was just rising, a waning crescent, and the stars were paler around it.

'How do you know about the _flora Veneris_?' asked Remus after a while.'I mean, even Dumbledore didn't know what to do for Minerva?'

Andrea frowned.'It was a long time ago,' she began slowly.'When I was seven.It was one of the strangest things that's ever happened to me.I was going home from a party with my older brother, late in the evening, and my brother walked more quickly than I did, and left me behind.Then a centaur suddenly stepped out from behind the hedge.I was stunned; I'd never seen one before, and I've never seen one since.He stopped me, and he said, 'I have something you must not forget.It will be the turn of three lives, one for each flower.Remember what I tell you.The _flora Veneris_.It blossoms only under the light of Venus, and it grows only on Glastonbury Tor.And it is the most powerful herb against the Dark that exists.'I had no idea what he was talking about, I thought he was crazy.But all he said was, 'I can see that one day you will need to know all of this.It is written.'Then he vanished.'She knotted her fingers in Altair's mane, silent for a moment.

'When I told my brother, he was frightened that he'd get into trouble for not taking proper care of me, and he made me promise I'd never tell anyone.I forgot all about it in time, I was very young, and there were plenty of other things to occupy my mind.And the _flora Veneris_ isn't used in healing or anything, so I never thought of it later.But then, just now, I dreamed of the centaur, and I realised what he had told me for.'

Remus looked at her in wonder.'Whose were the three lives, I wonder?Minerva for one, but who are the other two?'

'I have no idea.'

Altair began to fly lower, circling a hill, a mass of light and shadow.

'This is it.'Altair landed neatly, and stood still for them to dismount.At once they both turned to scan the moor around them.

'Do you know where the flowers will be?' asked Remus.Behind them, Altair snuffled and they heard the sounds of his teeth in the grass.

'I know they're around here somewhere.They won't be easy to miss, they glow brightly when Venus rises.But we do have to be quick, because they stop being useful once she sets.'

Remus turned to scour the landscape, but Andrea looked at the sky.

'You won't find them yet.Venus hasn't risen yet.'She sat down on the grass and gazed up at the stars.Beside her, Remus' face was half in shadow, but she saw him smile.Andrea began to see the shapes of the constellations and let out her breath in a long sigh.

'I used to love Astronomy when I was younger,' she said, apropos of nothing.'But apart from medical astrology, Healers don't use it much.I don't often get the chance to sit out at night like this, not working shifts.'

'I was never any good at Astronomy,' Remus responded, his words slow.'The night sky, the moon … no.'His voice trailed off, and Andrea looked at him compassionately.

'It must be hard,' she murmured.Remus did not reply, gazing with a strange fascination at the waning moon.

'Professor Sinistra despaired of me,' he said lightly.

'Who?'

'Our Astronomy teacher – oh, of course, you wouldn't know.Is this really the first time you've been at Hogwarts?'

'Well, more or less.The first time was earlier this month when I came to the League meeting.I couldn't come as a student.'

'Where did you go to school, then?'Remus' voice sounded as if he was merely curious, but his eyes were fixed to her.

'I didn't.I studied mostly by myself, at home, teaching myself out of books.Minerva helped me in the school holidays, because she was a friend of my parents before they … died.'

Remus' gaze became full of concern, and he made a soft sound of sympathy.Andrea continued to talk, almost as if to herself.

'We had a fire, and only my brother and I survived.He's done well, my brother, he's married and he has a little son Oliver.'She paused again.'But then – I had received the Hogwarts letter, of course, and my brother was already there, but I couldn't go.I spent most of the next three years in and out of the Halls of Healing.'Andrea fell silent, remembering the pain and the misery of being confined to her bed, and the loneliness of those years.Remus watched her spellbound, fearing to speak lest he break into her thoughts.

'Then, when I was better, Voldemort –' she stumbled over the name '- Voldemort had appeared, and the Ministry had passed some silly law to guard against his agents, and one part of it meant that students couldn't be admitted to Hogwarts apart from in the first year.Not that it did them much good.So I lived with my grandmother and Minerva taught me what she could.I knew I was going to be a Healer, and I went as an apprentice to the Halls a year early.I still love every minute I spend there.'

Andrea fell silent, wondering why she had suddenly told Remus all that.But he was watching her with sympathetic and understanding eyes, and she sat back with a sigh.A few moments later, in an effort to bring the conversation back to normal, she pointed at the sky.'You see that – that's Canis Major, and Sirius there.'

'What?Sirius?'Remus followed her pointing finger.

'Yes, the Dog Star.That very bright one on the horizon.The brightest star in the sky, in fact.'

Remus chuckled appreciatively.'The Dog Star?That's good.He's so clever.'

'What do you mean?'

'Oh … nothing.Sirius just likes dogs, that's all.'

Andrea's eyes narrowed as she heard a false note in his voice, and she turned away stiffly.Did all werewolves lie?Beside her, Remus sighed.

They sat without speaking.Then Andrea stood up.'Venus has risen.'She began to scan the grass around them.

'What should I look for?' asked Remus, seeing nothing but piebald shadows.

'The flowers will be shining.You won't miss them.' 

At the same moment, they both saw it.In the grass at the top of the hill, a shining patch of ground.There was no need to speak, and they matched strides towards it.

There were several clumps of the flowers, glowing like fallen stars.Andrea knelt down in the damp grass and cupped a flower in her hand.The five petals were silvery blue and glowing, almost throbbing with light.Remus bent down beside her and extended a finger to touch one, as if it were made of glass.

'It's warm,' he said in surprise.Then, in a soft voice, 'I don't want to pick it.'

'It'll be all right, it won't kill it until Venus sets.'But Andrea's hand was very reluctant as she put her fingers around the stem.The sound of her plucking it seemed too loud in the night.

Remus picked a second flower, and Andrea a third.

'We only need three.'Remus handed her his flower, and she held them carefully in between her finger and thumb.For a long time they looked at the flowers growing in the grass.Then Andrea was suddenly sharply aware of Remus looking no longer at the flowers but at her with a strange expression.She straightened up.

'We'd better get these back as soon as we can.There isn't much time.'She whistled, and a moment later the great winged horse stood nudging her with his nose.Altair looked white-eyed at the flowers, and his ears pricked forwards.

Andrea mounted, still holding the flowers, and Remus sat behind her.The horse did no more than lay his ears back as he drew near, and Andrea stroked his neck calmingly.

The flight back passed quickly, for Altair seemed to understand their urgency and flew low and swift.When they arrived, the sky was still dark, and Venus was high in the east.

'We have until dawn,' said Andrea, springing from Altair's back.Remus followed her into the castle.

'I'll go and warn Professor Dumbledore, then, shall I?' he suggested.

'Good idea.'

Andrea went up the stairs two at a time to the Infirmary.The flowers still shone, lighting her path.In the still-room, she carefully mixed up a clear liquid, her hands trembling a little with haste.She poured it into a crystal goblet.

Then she took the flowers and dropped them in one at a time.The light grew brighter, until the whole room shone with a yellow-gold glow.She touched the crystal, and was pleased to find it warm.When the light was almost too bright to look at, she carried the goblet into the side-chamber where Minerva lay.

The rays fell on her pallid face, and she turned and murmured something in her sleep.A smile crossed Andrea's face.Moving very carefully so as not to spill any of the potion, she sat on the edge of the bed.She dabbled a few drops of the warm, shining liquid on Minerva's lips and waited.

A few moments passed, and Andrea could see Minerva breathe more deeply, and her face lost the strained, fearful look it had been fixed in.Her eyelids fluttered.Andrea trickled a little more of the potion into her mouth, and gently brushed the hair away from her face.Then Minerva's eyes opened.For some time, she seemed to see nothing, and Andrea did not hurry her or disturb her.She knew from experience that waking up for the first time from any kind of coma was a slow process.When Minerva's eyes flickered to her, Andrea put a gentle hand on her arm.

Minerva tried to say something, but her voice was hoarse with disuse.Andrea could see that the curse was still hanging in the air around her, and she said softly, 'Drink this and you'll feel better.'

She held the goblet to Minerva's mouth with a steady hand.The potion worked swiftly, and very soon Andrea could sense that the dark shadow that had lain across Minerva for so many days was gone.With a gentle sigh, Minerva relaxed.Andrea could only smile for joy at her recovery.

A few moments later, Minerva looked up at Andrea, confused.'Why …?' she croaked.'Have I … been ill?'

'Yes, you have,' she said softly.'But don't worry about anything now, Minerva.What you need is sleep.'

Minerva turned her head and saw the beginnings of morning light in the east. 'How long…?'

'This is the eighth day you've been here.'Andrea put a reassuring hand on her shoulder as she said this.News like that was always a shock.

'But … my classes…'

Andrea almost laughed out loud.It was so typical of Minerva that the first thing she was concerned for was the school.

'They've been fine.Don't worry.It's all been taken care of.'

Minerva sighed and closed her eyes.

The door opened, and Dumbledore came in, with Remus trailing behind him.Andrea made a quick gesture for quiet, but almost broke into laughter herself at the sight of Professor Dumbledore in slippers and a dressing gown embroidered with greenery and flowers.Both of them looked first to Minerva, who had opened her eyes again.

'Albus …' she began.'Is everything all right?My classes… '

Professor Dumbledore's eyes twinkled.'Everything is fine.You don't need to worry, Minerva.Remus has taken care of things most admirably.'He crossed the room to take a good look at his colleague.'It's good to see you're better.'

Remus glanced at Andrea, who was placing the goblet carefully on a shelf.The movement caught Professor Dumbledore's eye.

'Ah, the _flora Veneris_.Remus explained everything to me.I must say it was something of a surprise to find that they had other applications than the old wives' tales.'He nodded to himself, and for a second his eyes flickered to Remus.'Not that old wives' tales don't have a grain of truth in them.'

Minerva rested her head on the pillow and yawned.

'Right, both of you, you can talk to Minerva later.Right now what she needs is sleep.'Andrea stood up.Remus obeyed her at once, and with a final smile for Minerva, Professor Dumbledore followed.Once the room was calm again, Andrea smoothed the covers around her patient and pulled down the blind.Very quickly, Minerva fell asleep.

When she was sleeping soundly, Andrea went into the still-room.Carefully, she took the still-glowing remains of the flowers from the goblet.They would lose their potency when Venus set.She flung two into the fire, but hesitated when she picked up the third.An old wives' tale about the _flora Veneris_ came into her mind, the one Dumbledore had meant.It was said that whoever kept a flower plucked under Venus would find true love come to them.With a self-mocking smile for her own credulity, she slipped the third flower into her pocket.

~

The next day Minerva was fully recovered, and so Remus and Andrea were no longer needed at Hogwarts.They were going back together, Andrea to the Halls of Healing and Remus to his flat not far away.The sky was grey and it was a cloudy afternoon as they walked away from the castle.In the meadow, Andrea whistled for Altair and waited. 

#### 'I'm going to see what I can do about the Wolfsbane Potion,' she said.'Those side effects you mentioned really shouldn't have happened.There must be a way of fixing it.'For a moment her eyes looked inward as she thought.

#### 'You don't need to worry about it.No matter what the side effects are, it's better than the transformation,' Remus assured her.

#### 'Yes, but I don't like the thought of it not working properly.And if I'm going to make it for general use, which I haven't yet because it's so experimental, I won't want to have to deal with side effects as well.'

#### 'Hmm, I suppose that makes sense.'

#### The winged horse came ambling over, nosing through the long grass hopefully.Remus looked at him in renewed amazement.

#### 'How did you come to get Altair?' he asked, reaching out to stroke Altair's neck.The horse flinched away and laid his ears back, and Remus winced.

#### 'It's a very long story.'She was reminded of what Remus was by Altair's response, and she busied herself picking bits of straw from his mane for a while.

#### 'He's such a magnificent creature, and they're incredibly rare.I certainly have never been this close to one.'Remus nudged her with his comments.

#### 'He's very special.'Andrea's voice took on a loving tone.Remus watched her, keeping a respectful distance from the horse's heels.'I've had him – what, nine years now.'

#### 

#### She swung herself onto his back, and Remus mounted behind her.The flight was high, above the clouds so that they would pass unnoticed by the Muggles, and the wind would have whipped any words from their mouths in an instant.Andrea's eyes were watering, and she bent a little lower over Altair's neck.It was about an hour's flight, and when they landed behind the Halls of Healing they were both chilly.

#### 

#### 'I'm taking Altair to the stable.'Remus followed Andrea across the lawn to a barn at the end, with a large field behind it.'It's lucky there are so many wizards in this area,' she said.'Otherwise it would be impossible to keep Altair here.'

#### Remus nodded.

#### 

#### In the stable, she began to rub Altair down with a handful of straw.

#### 'I don't know that much about them, but I do know they're very rare.Is it true that they can understand speech?'Remus gave Altair a half-nervous glance as he spoke.

#### 'I think so.Not all the time, and not everything, perhaps, but some things.They're far more intelligent than Muggle horses.'She caressed Altair's head.'That's why they're so valuable, of course.'

#### 'Do many other people in the country have one?'

#### 'I don't really know.I've never seen anyone else riding one, but that doesn't mean much.They aren't very common in England, there are more of them in the north of Greece, where the original Pegasus came from, and in the middle of Russia, in the southern Urals.And there are none at all in the Americas.'

#### 'Are they difficult to catch, then?'

#### Andrea considered this.Everyone said they were, but she had tamed Altair without a great deal of difficulty.Of course, the circumstances had been unusual, but even so….

#### 'They're supposed to be.But I got Altair when he was very young, so it wasn't as difficult.Like most animals, if you catch them young they're easy to tame.'

#### 'Was it in England you caught him?'

#### Andrea nodded.She could see he was still curious about how she had caught Altair, but she thought it would be better not to tell him.It wasn't exactly a pleasant story.But Remus asked anyway.

#### 'How did you catch him, then?'

#### 

#### Andrea was silent.For a moment she was nine years away, running, terrified, running faster than she ever had in her life.Altair nudged her with his nose, and Remus looked at her sudden pallor with worried eyes.

#### 'Are you all right?'

#### ' – oh – yes, yes.'She leaned across Altair's broad back, seeing Remus' face above hers, concerned.'It's not a very nice story,' she began uncertainly.'I don't want to – upset you.'

#### 'Don't worry about me,' said Remus at once, his curiosity even more piqued.

#### 'Well, all right.'She took a deep breath.'It was when I lived with my grandmother, and I had gone out one night to stargaze.We lived in a fairly isolated spot, but there were a lot of trees, and it was a long walk to go to a place where I could get a proper look at the sky.It was the full moon.'She shot a glance at Remus, and saw the muscles of his face tense slightly.'That's not the best time to stargaze, you know, but there was a conjunction of Jupiter and Saturn, and that's worth seeing.So I went out on my own to One Tree Hill…'

#### 

#### The moon was so bright it was almost day, and Andrea walked without fear.She knew the way to One Tree Hill blindfold, in any case.The woods were different at night, enchanted and beautiful in the silver shadows.She heard the low rustling of the autumn leaves as a night breeze kissed them, and a fox barked far off.He was answered, and an owl gave its hunting cry.

#### When she reached One Tree Hill, the planets were drawing closer, and she sat on the grass to watch the sky.The moon's light competed with the double gleam of Saturn and Jupiter, the two brightest of the planets.She watched the two lords of the heavens meet, disregarding the chill that began to grow in the autumn air.She watched for hours, until they began to move apart again.Finally she rose stiff-limbed and looked back at the world around her.On the far side of the hill, towards the river, there was something moving, rising into the air, and she heard a horse's neigh.She gazed down with eyes not used to the deep darkness of the earth.Then the creature in the air was silhouetted against the paler sky.For a few moments, Andrea did not recognise it, the creatures were so rare.But then she saw the wings, and the head of a horse against the moon, and knew that it was a Pegasus.She stared, and saw another rise, and another.

#### 

#### There must be a herd – or should it be a flock, she wondered – of them.Breathless with wonder, she began to go down the hill towards them.Nearer, she was full of awe and wonder at their beauty.They were stamping and flicking gleaming tails as they stood close together.One sniffed the wind, and gave a snort.He lifted into the air, gracefully, easily.Andrea wished she could touch one.But the others began to follow him, up and away.

#### 

#### From her hiding place in the shadows of the trees, Andrea moved nearer on velvet feet.A cloud passed over the moon.At the same time, she heard a low growl that made the hairs stand up along her spine.Then there was a snarl, and a horse squealed in pain.She heard the rush of many wings and the pounding of hooves on the ground, and shrank into the darkness, one hand tight on her wand.If only she'd thought to come on a broomstick instead of walking.She heard another squeal, and a yelp.There was a break in the cloud, and for a second she saw the silver hind leg of a Pegasus lash out at a large dark shadow that was leaping towards it.The shadowy animal turned tail, and the winged horse stood still.

#### 

#### It was only a colt, she realised, looking at its gangling legs and short body.Andrea saw suddenly that one of its wings was held at a strange angle, and there was a dark patch on its silver-grey hair.Whatever that creature had been, it must have somehow hurt the horse.Her fear forgotten for a moment, she crept forwards.She extended a hand to the Pegasus, hissing softly under her breath.He stood quivering, but did not shy away.She crouched very still before him, and he nudged her hand with his nose.

#### 'Easy, now, my beauty, gently now,' she murmured, and he did not move away.She reached up tentatively, ready to freeze if he showed signs of fleeing.But he stood still as she rested a hand on the top of his neck.Andrea knew about horses, and this was the place where a mare licked her foal.She stroked him, slowly and carefully, and he thrust his nose into her robes.

#### 

#### Suddenly his head went up, ears swivelling around, and his nostrils dilated as he sniffed the wind.She saw his ears go back against flat his head.He snorted and made an effort to fly.Andrea only got out of the way of his outstretched wing in time.But he could not fly, for one wing was damaged.She wondered if she'd done something to frighten him, and clucked gently.He was not soothed.

#### 

#### He swung around and bounded away.As if in slow motion, Andrea looked back and saw the shadowy creature was returning, padding from the far edge of the clearing.And the full moon shone upon it, and she knew in a flash of horror that it was a werewolf.For a long, terrible moment, she was frozen.Then with a gasp, she flung herself after the horse.

#### 

#### The werewolf followed.Andrea ran, ran faster than she had ever done before.She and the horse crashed through the undergrowth, racing downhill.And behind them the werewolf's teeth gleamed in the moonlight.Her heart was pounding, and she was desperately trying to think up some way to escape.There was only one hope, and that was the tiny deserted hut by the river.Everything else was too far away.Her legs carried her stumbling, knowing a fall would be her ruin, downhill to the river.The horse was at her side.She grabbed for its mane, and half-dragged herself across its back, praying it would not buck.Somehow, as the horse broke into a neat-footed canter, she managed to sit astride it.She cast herself flat across its neck as a low branch nearly swept her off.

#### 

#### The wild ride through the woods carried them to the banks of the river.There the horse wanted to cross, but Andrea could see the hut ahead of them.She steered the horse with all her might towards it.Behind them, the wolf howled.The horse put on an extra burst of speed.As they came to the hut, Andrea threw herself off.She rolled over on the ground and bounced to her feet.The horse came to a skidding halt beside her, and she heaved at the door.It was old and swollen with damp.The wolf howled again with a note of triumph.The door burst open, and she flung herself through into the cottage.The horse did not need any provocation to follow.As she turned to slam it closed, she saw the wolf's yellow eyes regarding her as he leapt, and the slavering jaw.He crashed against the door as she slammed it, and leaned her weight on it to hold it closed.There were some old rusty bolts on the inside, and she creaked them home.

#### 

#### Shaking violently, she dropped to the ground and lay there as her legs would no longer support her.Her heart was trying to beat its way out of her chest, she couldn't breathe.Tears of shock and fear began to leak from her eyes.Something touched her shoulder, and she stifled a scream.She turned over to see the winged horse bending his head to her curiously.Breathing shallowly, she pulled herself and put her arms around the horse's neck, pressing her face against him.

#### 

#### All the remainder of the night, the wolf padded around the hut, seeking an entrance.To calm her mind, Andrea tried to tend to the horse's damaged wing, conjuring what she needed.But she could not use her magic to Disapparate, because whilst she could move herself, the horse would stay behind.And his swift legs had saved her life.

#### 

#### There was a tiny slit window in the hut, too small for the wolf to enter by.Through it Andrea could see the sky.The Eagle was flying low in the south-west, and a red star winked at her.

#### 'Altair,' she murmured.The horse nudged her with his nose.That would be a good name, she thought, for a horse that flew like an eagle.

#### 'Altair,' she said aloud as she washed the horse's cut.'Do you like it?Is it a good name?'The horse seemed to agree, or perhaps it was just a trick of her mind.Well, it would do.

#### 

#### The wolf howled again.The night was growing paler, and soon it would be dawn.Andrea waited, cold, nestling her hands under Altair's mane.As the sky began to lighten, she sat on the earthen floor and pulled her cloak around her.

#### 

#### There came a scream, high and inhuman.It terrified her, and Altair's eyes showed the whites all around the warmth of the brown.The scream came again, and then a more frightening silence.Was some other person unfortunate enough to be out there?But no, the sun had just risen, and the werewolf would be no longer dangerous.

#### 

#### Not wanting to know, but unable to keep from looking, Andrea went to the slit window.On the grass she saw a shape in the grey light, covered in a ragged robe.A low groan came from it, and she saw the edge of a face scratched and deathly pale.His mouth was half-open, and she saw shining white teeth.It was not some victim, but the werewolf himself.Her skin prickled.

#### 

#### 'Let's get away from here,' she said, breathless.Her hands shook a little as she pulled back the bolts and eased the door open.Andrea began to lead her horse homewards, taking a detour to avoid the werewolf lying on the ground.They walked together, Altair making no attempt to flee, through the woods and over One Tree Hill to Andrea's cottage.It seemed impossible that the birds could be singing as if nothing at all had happened.

#### 

#### 'That's what I see … when I wake up in the middle of the night … not the wolf chasing me –' her voice was shaking'– but his face … like that.'Andrea was very pale, and she put her face in her hands.'I had nightmares … for almost a year … I still do, sometimes.'Like that night I first met you, she thought, but did not say aloud.She took a sobbing breath.Without pausing to think, Remus put his arms around her and held her close.She recoiled for a second, and then she clung to him.

#### 'It's all right,' he murmured, as if she were a small child.'Don't worry.'

#### Andrea raised her head to look at him.How odd, she thought confusedly, that another werewolf should be the one who soothed her after the first had terrified her.

#### 'I'm sorry … 'She wasn't sure what she was sorry for, but he only squeezed her shoulder. 

#### 'It's all right,' he said again.As she pulled herself together, she sat up and he released her.

#### 'Thank you.I – didn't mean to go on like that…'

#### 'You were extremely brave,' Remus reassured her.'It's an incredible story.It must have been awful for you.And then creating the Wolfsbane Potion – it's amazing what you've done.'

#### Andrea stood up.What had possessed her to tell Remus so much about herself these past two days?But he had a way about him that inspired trust.She looked at him, thinking, until she realised he was looking straight back with clear grey eyes.Uncertainly, she turned away.

'I guess I'd better be getting up to the Halls,' she said.'I'm sure I'll see you around.'

'Yes.'He straightened his robe and left the stable with her.They parted on the lawn, and Andrea did not look back as she went up to the door to the Halls of Healing.

~

'Right, this is it.'Andrea had been spending all her spare time working on the Wolfsbane Potion, and she finally had come up with another version that she hoped would have fewer and milder side effects.Remus looked at the murky liquid in the bottle.

'Wonderful,' he said.'Do I still have to take it all this week?' 

'Yes.'

'Have you done anything about the taste?' he asked with a grin.

Andrea lowered her eyebrows with mock severity.'As if I haven't done enough work on it!It doesn't taste that bad, I had a sip of it.'

Remus laughed.'All right, all right.'He looked around the laboratory.'I tell you, this is amazing.I never quite got to grips with Potions, not so that I could understand the more complex stuff.It didn't really interest me.'

'Well, it's not as much fun as my real work.'Andrea unconsciously fingered the green belt with its emblem of a caduceus which she wore around her white robes.'And speaking of which, if this works out I'll start producing the Potion for general use.'

'Good.'Remus took the bottle.After a brief silence, he said, 'I'd best be off now.Thank you very much.'

'Not at all.'Andrea began to clear away the equipment as he left.She hoped the potion would work as she had planned.It had been a lot of work, going through all the ingredients and trying to work out what caused the side effect and alter or replace it without destroying the use of the potion altogether.

The bell at her girdle rang, and she hurried down to the main halls.

~

Andrea looked back at the set of magical mirrors, scrying balls and enchanted charts that were arrayed across the tables.Nothing was changing anywhere.It had been a recent idea, to use the League's offices to house places where they would watch certain spots for any presence of Voldemort or his servants.Mostly, nothing happened, and watching it was deadly dull.The League only had three offices apart from Hogwarts: the one in Diagon Alley which had been attacked a few years ago, one in Edinburgh and this office in Aldershot, for they were the three largest magical settlements in the country apart from Hogsmeade.And because they both lived in Aldershot, Andrea and Remus had to do a lot of the work for it.

'Still nothing.'Andrea sat down again, yawning.They had been put on alert because of an attack in France, in Lille, and they had been in the office since noon when the attack had happened.

'I'd rather see nothing than find out that Voldemort's done something,' Remus commented.He looked at Andrea with a smile.

'True.'Andrea glanced out the window at the sun low in the west.'Shouldn't you be going home now?'Though she did trust Remus, she had no wish to be present while he transformed.It had been hard enough the last time.

'There's some time yet,' he answered, a thoughtful look on his face.'I won't be here tomorrow as it is, so I'll keep you company a bit longer.'

'It's all right, I'll be fine.'Andrea thought she would prefer to be alone than waiting for him to leave before the moon rose.'Anyway, if the Potion works properly you should have no trouble at all.And this could have all blown over by tomorrow.Lille isn't exactly on our doorstep.'

He nodded absently and stared out the window.Andrea took the opportunity to look at him.He had seemed preoccupied all afternoon, but she had not asked him why.After all, it was the full moon tonight.

#### 

#### The sun was setting, and deep red rays filled the room.Remus took a deep breath and left the window.He gazed straight at her, and there was such strength of emotion in his eyes that she felt a twinge of nervousness.The red light glinted on his face, and a shiver ran down her spine.

#### 

#### 'Andrea, listen to me.There's something I have to – to tell you.'Andrea raised an eyebrow.He looked very strange, so resolute and determined.

#### 'I want you to know that ever since I first met you, I – I've loved you.'

#### 

#### Approaching her as he spoke, he put his hand hesitantly on her arm.Andrea stumbled back jerkily.His words, the same words Fenris had used, were crashing through her mind.The same words, the same lies Fenris had told her to win her to him.His touch, the same touch, seared through her.Remus' eyes were gentle, but she scarcely saw them, for the world seemed split in two.

#### 

#### Part of her knew full well that she was in the League office with Remus.Knew that he had taken the Wolfsbane Potion and could not harm her.But the other scene in her mind was clearer.Fenris was standing close to her, his breathing loud and heavy on her neck, and his voice was saying the words Remus had spoken.And he reached out and caught her arm to pull her towards his embrace…

_'No!Leave me alone!'_These, too were the same words she had used before, then to no avail.For a moment she didn't realise she'd said them aloud.But then Remus froze as though she'd slapped him.All expression drained from his face, and he looked at the ground.

Andrea was breathing raggedly, and her heart was pounding.She could not bear to look at Remus, lest she see the wolf glaring from his eyes the way she had seen it in Fenris' as he came nearer.For a second longer, she stood trembling.Then she whirled around and dashed to the door in a flurry of white robes.

She ran down the stairs and outside.A blackbird flew up with a sharp 'chack-chack' of alarm as she burst out the door, and Altair neighed.He trotted towards her and she flung herself across his broad back.

'Oh, Altair, why can't I meet a normal man?' she asked wildly.Catching her mood, he leapt into the air with a flick of his wings.'Will werewolves chase after me all my life?'

#### 

#### As the Pegasus soared up, she reached into her pocket and pulled out the flower she had kept there.Whatever true love might be, she wanted none of it, not if it came in such a shape.She let the flower fall.The dry leaves and petals drifted downwards on the wind, spiralling down and out of sight.

#### 

#### TO BE CONTINUED

#### 

#### Well, that was long.Did everything make sense?

#### The next part's going to be called Omnia Vincit Amor (Love Conquers All).

#### Blaise

#### 11th March 2000 (wow, it's exactly two months since my first story!)

#### 

#### Revised version 17th March 2000, with the greatest thanks to CLS.

_ _


	6. omnia vincit amor

#### The Farther Shore - Part VI: Omnia Vincit Amor 

#### 

#### You should know this quote.It's extremely famous.'Love conquers all things.'(Vergil. Eclogues, 10, 29).No prizes for guessing what it's about!It's going to be another long one, so I hope you have some time.

#### 

#### By the way, I made some changes to 'Flower of Venus.'Everything will still make sense, I hope, but it will make more sense if you go and look at them first.Most of the changes are in the last scene, so you don't have to read through it all again if you don't want to.

#### 

#### ~

Remus stood frozen for a moment longer.Then he pelted down the stairs after Andrea, horrified.What had he done?As he reached the garden, he saw Altair flying into the sky.He bowed his head.Well, there was no way he could change her heart.If she did not care for him, then she did not.He thought of the look of terror and fear in her eyes when he had spoken._Leave me alone! _Her words echoed through his head like drums, echoed the fall of his feet as he climbed back to the office.

It was foolish of him ever to have hoped.He knew no woman would come near him, once she found out.But Andrea had, she had spoken to him and been kind to him even though she knew what he was.And now he had ruined it all, ruined it with his rashness, with his haste.

Why had she fled so abruptly?Was he really that terrible a prospect?He put his face in his hands for a moment.Yes, you are, he told himself.A werewolf.What woman in her senses _wouldn't_ run from a werewolf?

He shuddered as the night began to darken.Before the full moon rose, he slowly sipped the improved version of the Wolfsbane Potion._Oh, Andrea, Andrea…_

~

#### Andrea stared from the window with eyes that scarcely saw.Only the moon filled her gaze, made fuzzy-edged by her tears.The fear she had felt from Remus' approach was fading a little, as she sought to calm herself.He's not Fenris, he didn't mean to frighten you, the rational part of her mind was saying over and over.But what good was her rational mind when she could feel Fenris' hands upon her?

#### 

#### She got up and paced around the room, as if she could walk away from her memories.Ever since I first met you, I've loved you.First Fenris, then Remus spoke the words.A new thought struck her.Remus had not been telling her for the reason Fenris had, he did not wish to seduce her with his words.So he must have been in earnest.And what did you do to him? she demanded of herself.The answer was dreadfully clear.She collapsed onto the chair again, guilt adding itself to her array of emotions.

#### 

#### At last she fell asleep, still sitting by the window as the sky was turning from black to midnight blue.But her sleep was as painful as her waking, for she was visited again by the werewolf.Half-transformed, he lay on the ground and looked at her with the wolf's eyes, and his face was Remus' face.And Fenris pursued her thought the forest, first as a wolf, and then as a man.She screamed and screamed, but there was nobody to hear.

#### 

#### ~

#### 

#### There was a pounding noise, a knocking on her door.Andrea sat upright, blinking.Her bell was clanging as well.Something was wrong.She sprang to her feet, stiff from sleeping in the hard chair.It was late afternoon, to judge by the light.Had she slept all day?She began to remember how she had spent the night, and shivered.The knocking was repeated.

#### 

#### 'Dr Wood!Are you there?' shouted a man's voice.

#### Andrea straightened her creased robes and pulled the door open.Sirius Black was standing in the doorway, looking worried and impatient. 

#### 'Oh, good.You've got to come at once,' he said, looking at her with evident relief.

#### 'What is it?' she asked quickly.'What's happened?'She had sudden visions of terrible disasters occurring while she slept.

#### 'It's Remus.'An icy hand gripped Andrea's stomach, and she swallowed hard.'He's really ill.'

#### 'What happened to him?' she asked tersely.

#### 'He collapsed in the League office – last night, I guess.We only just found him – we realised when Dumbledore tried to contact him.He's downstairs, but the lady said to get you.She thinks it's something to do with your – what's it called – your Wolfsbane Potion.'

#### Andrea let out her breath in a long hiss.How had it gone wrong?

#### 'Where is he now?' she asked, putting her shoes on.'I'll come straight down.'

#### 'In one of the wards, in the East Wing.There are some Healers with him already, but the lady said to get you.'

#### 'Right.'Andrea closed the door and began to stride through the halls.Sirius kept pace with her easily.She knew she had to keep moving, keep her mind running on its professional tracks, or she might start to cry again.

#### 

#### Catherine Lewis came to meet her.'Where were you?The bell's been ringing for ages.'

#### 'Sorry – I was asleep.'

#### Cathy raised her eyebrows but did not comment.'Mr Lupin's in the side ward.'She led Andrea to a door off the entrance to the main ward.James and Lily Potter were also there, and along with Sirius they followed the two Healers into the room.

#### 

#### Andrea forced herself to breathe steadily and not to hesitate.She could feel four pairs of eyes watching her as she crossed to the bed.As her gaze fell upon him, she stopped dead for a second.His face was the face she had seen in her dreams.Cathy came to join her, and Andrea pushed herself towards the bed.

#### 

#### Automatically, her hands not quite steady, she felt for a pulse and breathing.She reached out to his chest and twitched her fingers until she could sense the aura around him.The familiar rhythmic movements of her hands soothed her a little as she concentrated on the problem at hand.Once or twice he started as she felt the aura, and when her hands reached his scarred shoulder, he gave a low moan.Andrea examined him for about ten minutes, while the others watched with interest and concern.

#### 

Finally, she stepped back.'It is the Wolfsbane Potion.'

'Yes, that's what I thought,' said Cathy, sounding quite pleased.

'What happened?' Sirius asked, his voice too loud in the small room.'I thought it was supposed to _help_ him.'

'I think the improvements I made didn't work out.The Potion still created the same effect of letting him keep his mind, but instead of being lessened, the side effects have been increased greatly.'Andrea spoke in her most professional tone.

'What are you going to do for him?' asked James, coming closer to gaze at his friend in concern.

Andrea took a deep breath.'There isn't anything specific I can do.The Potion's effects will wear off of their own accord, and he'll recover.'

James and Sirius both nodded.

'So long as he'll be all right,' said James.

'He will.'

'Good.'

They stood looking at Remus for a long time, while Andrea waited.'I'll be staying here, if you have anything else you have to do.'

James turned to Lily.'We'd better get back home.'She nodded.'What will you do, Sirius.'

'Dumbledore told me to take over in the League office.'He groaned.'It'll be deadly dull.If there's any change, I'll come straight away.'

'That's fine.'

With a final look at Remus, they went out again, leaving Andrea on her own.

#### Andrea lowered herself into the chair by the bed.She forced herself to look at Remus.He was so still, a stillness she only saw in the most ill of her patients, when movement was actually impossible.

#### 

#### You did this.You didn't take enough care over that bloody potion.It's your fault.She let out her breath in a shudder that was almost a sob.It didn't matter that all she had intended was to help him.The only thing that mattered, the only real thing, was his limp body on the bed before her.

#### 

#### The half-light in the room made his face seem even more ashen.His dark hair traced strange symbols on the pillow.Andrea leaned forwards suddenly and brushed away a tendril that had fallen across his face.It was unexpectedly fine and soft.With slow touches she smoothed it back, framing the outline of his face, his thin cheeks and the sharp outline of his jaw.She looked full into his face for the first time.His sea-grey eyes were hidden, but she could see them all too clearly in her mind, the pain in them only half masked.

Outside, the sky began to darken.Above the high thin cloud, the first stars appeared.The moon came up.When its light fell upon Remus, he cried out a little.Andrea rose and drew the curtains.She sat beside him in the dark.She could hear the slow hiss of his breath, and she imagined she could feel it on her cheek._Oh, Remus_, she thought._What have I done?How could I have hurt you so?_

Her own voice answered her, running over and over in her mind._Leave me alone! _She would have given anything to go back there, to give him a different answer. _All he did was care for you, help you, listen to you, and how did you answer him?_The question reverberated through her head, and she tore at her soul all night.

~

She was still at his side, awake, when the sky began to turn from black to grey, and behind the clouds the sun rose.He had stirred a few times in the deep sleep, and Andrea realised that soon he would wake up.

His eyelids fluttered.She sat tense and still, waiting.Then, remembering herself, she felt for the aura, and felt him slipping back into consciousness.She heard him give a faint moan, just above the threshold of hearing, and for a second his eyes flickered open and then shut.He looked so much like the face she saw in her nightmares that she rose.She went to the window and looked out, forcing herself to be calm.

She felt no sense of triumph that Remus was recovering, for she had caused his illness and had done nothing for his cure.She watched him.

He turned over and then opened his eyes completely.For a moment he seemed to see nothing, and then his eyes found Andrea's face.Still only half-awake, he smiled at her.Her heart unexpectedly missed a beat.

'How do you feel?' she asked.

Remus rubbed his eyes as he became fully alert, and looked at her again.His face turned to stone.

'I'm all right,' he said frozenly, though this was patently untrue.He looked away.

Andrea took a long breath, and her own smile changed to a look of professional detachment.She struggled to maintain it as she bent to feel for his pulse.A strand of hair that had escaped her bun fell across his face.With a weak hand, he brushed it away.

She straightened up, wishing she could say something to cut across the dreadful silence, but no words came to her lips.He looked across the room, away from her._Remus, Remus_, she cried in her mind._Don't do this to me._But then she thought bitterly, _Is it any worse than what you did to him?_She realised that he would not speak until she did.

'I want to say – I mean …' she began, stopped, and then tried again.'I was so afraid – oh, God, this is no good.'She reached out to him and put her hand on his arm.He flinched and turned away as if she had burnt him.

'Oh, Remus.'She found no words for her feelings, and she put her head against his shoulder.'I'm sorry.'

For a second so long she thought it would never end, he did nothing.She could feel him shaking a little.Then his hand came up and he stroked her hair softly.

Finally he looked at her.

'You don't want to have anything to do with a – a werewolf,' he stated baldly, his hand falling away.

Andrea tensed a little.She took another deep breath.

'That wasn't the reason – that's not why I was afraid,' she began, stumbling a little over her words.'I … on Friday, you reminded me of … of someone I'd rather forget….'

She made herself more comfortable at his side, and he propped himself up on his elbows, watching her.

'It was a man I know – I met him about a year ago now.He – well, I suppose you could say he swept me off my feet.'Remus' face tensed a little.'I was – even more naïve than I am now, and he – he took advantage of me.For a long time … I worshipped the ground he walked on, but … but I was a little afraid of him.'Remus' expression changed to the beginnings of anger.'He was acting as a subject for a trial run of an experimental potion,' she continued, less nervously, 'and he came to me and told me that it had – changed his transformation.He told me he was a werewolf.And then he … he said exactly the same thing to me … the same words you used.'She closed her eyes for a moment, back in her office alone with Fenris.It had not been frightening until the very last moment, when his eyes wore the same expression of devouring hunger as the wolf who had chased her.She had only been lucky that Cathy had come in and saved her.'And then … you didn't mean to, but you did the same thing … the same words he'd used.That's why I – I was afraid.'

Remus nodded slowly.'I understand,' he said, and she realised with a flash of amazement that he truly did.For a while they sat in silence, and just as Remus was about to say something else, the door opened.

'Dr Wood, can you – oh!'Sirius stared at his friend sitting up in bed.'Moony, you're better!'He bounded across the room and embraced Remus.'How do you feel?We've all been worried sick about you.'

'I'm – I'm fine.'Remus spoke in gasps; Sirius' impulsive hug had knocked the breath out of him.

Sirius looked into his face, and saw a soft glow there.He glanced at Andrea, and then back at Remus, and he gave a shrewd smile.

'James and Lily are outside.Shall I ask them to come in?'Without waiting for an answer, Sirius went to the window.'Dark in here, isn't it?'He flung open the curtains.It was late morning, and the sun had broken through the clouds.Remus and Andrea both blinked in the sudden light.

'I'll just get Lily and James, shall I?They got here about half an hour ago.'

He ducked out the door again, and a few minutes later all three of them came in.Andrea made herself scarce as they talked, or rather as Sirius talked, and James and Remus added words when they could.She went out into the main ward, feeling a little disorientated.Cathy came over.

'How is he?' she asked.'You've been in there all night, haven't you?'

'He's woken up, and he's talking to his friends,' Andrea said by way of explanation.'I'm going to have a cup of tea or something, and I'll send them away when I come back.'

Cathy nodded.'Still weak, is he?'

'Yes.I think it would be wise for him to remain here another day or two, just to be sure everything's okay.'

'Right you are, then.'

Andrea walked off through the wards, pausing to speak to her colleagues and to some of the patients.She felt lighter, somehow, as she put the kettle on in her office and looked through her post.The sunlight glinted on her mirror, and she found herself combing her hair back neatly and straightening her robes before it.She smiled at her reflection, and it smiled back.

~

'Andrea, I really want to get back home,' Remus greeted her in the morning, sitting up in bed.

She laughed.

'I don't mean that it's unpleasant here,' he said hastily.'Everybody's been very kind.It's just that …'

'I know.It's no fun being in hospital as a patient.Three days should be enough for anyone.Believe me, I understand.'She nodded, and looked at him critically.'Well, I suppose you could go home if you wanted.But you have to promise you won't do anything stressful for a while.'

'That's fine.'

Twenty minutes later, he was dressed and standing in the entrance to his room, one hand resting lightly on the frame of the door.Andrea gave him a keen look.

'Perhaps I'll walk back with you.'

'I'm fine,' he protested.

Andrea only smiled.'I'll enjoy the walk.'She reached into thin air and produced a light cloak.Remus raised an eyebrow.As they went down the stairs together, she saw that he was carefully masking his weariness, but said nothing.

The spring morning was beautiful, and as they went down through the wizarding district, they were silent, absorbing the loveliness of it.They came into the park, and Remus began to stumble a bit.Giving him a sideways glance, Andrea said, 'You'd better sit down for a minute.'He did not protest, but followed Andrea to a bench.

'I think I've figured out what went wrong with the Potion,' said Andrea after a minute, when he seemed to have recovered his breath.'It was one of the ingredients – the moonwort – it had gone a little musty.The next version of it will be fine.'

Remus smiled a little.'I trust you.Are you going to make it for general use?'

She nodded.'How much d'you think I'll need to make?'

'I don't really know.'Remus thought for a moment.'You know, I haven't got a clue how many werewolves there are in England.And – people keep getting bitten.'A look of pain crossed his face, and for a few moments they were both silent.

Then Andrea asked something she had been afraid to ask before, even in their long conversations in the halls of healing.

'How did you get bitten?'She looked up at him nervously as she spoke.'You don't mind me asking?' she added.

'No … of course I don't.'He gathered his breath.'It was when I was nine years old.I was coming home later than I had thought, from a friend's house, and I saw no need to hurry.It was a clear, lovely evening.I was sure it would be safe, after all, the moon was full and it was as light as day.My parents were probably worrying, but I wasn't old enough to be concerned about that.While I was walking back along the road that wound through the woods, I heard a howl.'

His words were forcing Andrea back into her memories, and she too heard the howl in her mind.She wanted to interrupt him, to tell him to stop, but she could not speak.He carried on.

'It wasn't a sound I had ever heard before, and I thought it was an owl or something.But when it was repeated close behind me, I began to get frightened.'Andrea shut her eyes in a futile attempt to block out the image of the dark shadow leaping out at her.She groped out and found Remus' hand.

'Then I began to run.I didn't dare look back to see what it was, but I knew it was chasing me.But just when I was on the edge of the town, the wolf … snatched me.'His hand shook a little in hers, and she opened her eyes.He was very pale, and unconsciously, his free hand had reached up to the scar on his shoulder.'I don't really remember … what happened next.'His hand tightened on hers.'My father found me … I don't know when …lying in the road.I had no idea what had happened, and nobody realised … until the Healer told us.I don't think I really understood then … what it would mean.I didn't begin to understand until … until the first time I transformed.'He stared very hard at the grass.Andrea felt him tremble a little.'I thought … I was dying then … and then I was a wolf.'He was definitely shaking now.'You can't imagine it – all I want … when I'm a wolf … is to – to bite people … to hurt them.That's what I am, Andrea, that's … who I am.'

His voice faded into nothing.Andrea was dragged out of her own self-pity by his anguish.Whatever she had gone through, she began to understand, his torment was a thousand times worse.She reached out to him and pulled him to her, sensing that her touch might answer the cry of misery in his voice better than her words could express.His eyes were closed, and he rested his head on her chest.She cradled him close.

'It doesn't matter, Remus,' she said at last, her voice low and vehement.'It doesn't matter in the slightest.I don't think of you like – like that.You're not just a werewolf, you're Remus.Don't think so poorly of yourself.'As she spoke, she thought how inadequate her words were.But he looked up at her with glistening eyes, and gave a weak smile.

After a bit, Remus stood up.Andrea followed him and they finished the walk to his flat in silence.It was not an uncomfortable silence, simply the quiet of two people who are unembarrassed in each other's company.Andrea took his arm, and by the time they reached the flat he was glad of her support.

'Now, go and rest,' she said with a smile as he unlocked the door.'There's nothing pressing for the League to do, and if anything crops up I'll sort it out.You lie down.'

He laughed.'Yes, doctor.'

'Get on with you.'

Remus went in, and closed the door.Andrea stood for a split second on the doorstep, and then went back to the Halls of Healing.

Catherine Lewis met her in Reception, holding a sheaf of papers in her arms.

'You took your time.Is your werewolf all right now?'

Andrea flinched slightly at the phrasing, but said, 'Yes, he'll be fine.'

'Good.Well, there a few things we need you to see to.Come on up.'

Andrea followed Cathy up to the office and flipped through the job application forms with her, but she found it unusually difficult to concentrate.Catherine looked at her in exasperation.

'What is it with you?I don't believe you've heard a word I said.'

'Sorry.'Andrea pulled herself together.She mustn't let this jeopardise her word.'No, I agree, this person wouldn't do at all.'She pointed at the smiling picture attached to a form.'We need someone with a bit more experience.'With a sigh, she resigned herself to reading seventeen more application forms.

~

'Would you like to – if you're free Saturday evening – would you like to come out and have dinner with me?'Remus fiddled nervously with a sheaf of papers as he spoke, but his eyes were fixed to Andrea.They had spent the week going to and from each other's homes and the League office on various excuses, and finally on no excuse at all.

'I'd love to.'Andrea's smile was so wide it seemed to split her face in half.Her old-fashioned upbringing had made her wary of asking him, and all this week she had wondered whether she dared.Now he had got there before her.

'It's a dinner dance – only a little thing, I think, down at the Red Griffin.'He named a small hotel at the far end of the High Street.

'Sounds wonderful.'

~

Now, as she sat at the table by the window of the restaurant, Andrea smiled at Remus, thinking of how nervous he had seemed when he had called for her a few hours ago.If it came to that, she had been pretty nervous herself.But the food had been excellent, and she was enjoying herself tremendously.

'This time next week, I should have the Potion sorted out.I've put the advertisements in the Prophet like you said, and I think there'll be a good response,' she said.'Will you be there to give me a hand?'

'Of course I will.It's the first quarter next Saturday, is it?'

'Yes.'It was necessary to take the Wolfsbane Potion a week in advance of the full moon, for reasons Andrea still did not fully understand.Yet again she was amazed at the series of chances that had led to its invention.And that had led her to meet Remus.

There was a band in the corner of the room.Remus and Andrea had long finished eating when the saxophonist began to play.

'Would you care to dance?' asked Andrea, inclining her head towards him in a stately bow and then grinning.Remus flushed a little, and stood up.

'I think the last time I've danced was at Lily and James' wedding,' he said.'I'm not very good.'

'Who cares?'Andrea's eyes were alight and her foot was tapping to the music.

It was a fast number, and Andrea's feet flew.She had learned to dance when she was very young; one of her first memories was of dancing on New Year's Day with her father.Remus led her as best he could.She spun around and around in the final crescendo, and then collapsed dizzily against him, laughing.Other couples were joining them on the floor, and during the second dance more than one pair of eyes followed Andrea as she swirled and twisted.Remus felt the eyes upon them and his dancing became even more self-conscious.He ended by stepping on Andrea's foot and losing the beat.She smiled encouragingly at him, but he still looked anxious.

'Let's sit this one out, shall we?' he suggested as the band struck up another song.They went to stand by the side, and watched the other people dance.

'You're so good.I wish I had paid more attention to Sirius when he tried to explain how to do all this.'Remus smiled.'Sirius is a brilliant dancer.'

'Dancing with you is great,' said Andrea, her eye following a couple across the floor.The man was excellent, but the girl he was with didn't seem to understand where he was leading her.'I'll teach you more if you want.'

'Perhaps later.I need a rest.' 

She nodded, still watching the dancers.

'Shall I get you another drink?' he asked after a while.'What would you like?'

'A Gillywater, please.'

He nodded and made his way over to the bar.The band paused, and a man came up to Andrea.

'Hey, I saw you earlier; you're a great dancer.Can I have the next?'

He was the person she'd been watching, the man who had danced so well.It had been so long since she'd danced with someone really good.

'Why not?' she said.'I'm sure Remus – my escort – won't mind.'She glanced up.There was a long queue at the bar, and the band had started up another number.

He began with a bow, and caught her hands.She felt the difference at once as the man steered her around and spun her across him and back.After a while, people began to get out of their way to watch.From the bar, Remus turned around and his jaw dropped.They were flying across the floor, and Andrea's head was flung back with an expression of sheer joy.In the final spin her long velvet skirt flared out around her like the petal of a flower, and when the band stopped there was a round of applause.Andrea curtseyed, suddenly self-conscious again, and the man bowed.

'Wow,' he said.'That was superb.'

Still breathless, she nodded.She caught Remus' eye across the room and smiled hopefully at him.He returned it with a rather strained expression.

'Come on,' said the man enthusiastically.'Let's keep going.'

Before she could make any reply, the band began to play a very fast piece, and she felt herself caught up in the pull of the music.This time they had the floor to themselves.Andrea forgot everything else as she danced except the rhythm and patterns of the music, and the man's next move.

There was more applause at the end.The band began to play a slow ballad, and other couples joined them on the floor.Remus' eyes on her were wistful.

'I'd better go join to my escort,' she said.'Thank you very much.'

'It was my pleasure.'The man gave her a long bow.'Perhaps later?'

She only smiled, and made her way across the floor to Remus.

When Andrea joined him, he passed her the drink and said nothing.

'I hope you didn't mind,' she said worriedly, sipping it.'It was so much fun, dancing like that.'

'You're far too good a dancer to spend all evening putting up with me treading on your toes,' he replied.She wondered whether he was in earnest.There was a look on his face that she couldn't quite interpret.

'So long as you don't mind.Would you like to dance?'

'I'll watch you.'

She smiled at him and slipped her arm into his, and they both watched swirling couples.After a few moments, another man came up to Andrea.

'Care to dance?' he asked, one eye on Remus.

Remus released her arm.'Go on.'

With a backwards glance, Andrea allowed the man to lead her out again.For almost an hour, she danced with different men, all the best dancers of the evening.And for that hour, Remus watched.

'Last dance, ladies and gentlemen, last dance.'The man Andrea was dancing with looked at her hopefully as the band introduced a slow, romantic song.

'Sorry,' she said.'I've arranged to dance with someone else.'She glanced across the room to where Remus stood alone.

The man smiled politely.'Never mind.Thank you very much.'

Andrea went over to Remus.He looked a little surprised.

'Come and dance with me,' she said.

'Are you sure?'

In answer she leaned into his arms as the piece began.

The music seemed to carry them across the floor.Remus' arms were around her, and she put her head on his shoulder.Somehow, he was exactly the right height.She looked up.He was smiling at her, and his eyes were very bright.His arms tightened around her, and she could feel his heart beating.They swayed, moving slowly together as the music continued.

I love you, she thought.It was so loud in her head that she thought he must be able to understand.And perhaps he did, for his face came closer to hers, closer still, until she darted across the tiny gap and kissed him.

~

When the music ended, they were both startled.Around them people were moving towards the door, congratulating the band and talking loudly.Remus and Andrea slowly went out, arm in arm.There was a chill wind, and Andrea found herself shivering despite his closeness.He unfastened his black cloak and draped it over her, leaving his arm across his shoulders.He pulled her towards him.

'My darling Andrea,' he murmured.He looked at the sky, but the moon was new.She traced the edge of his jaw with her finger and he leaned into her embrace.

Words seemed too clumsy to describe what she felt, and when he met her eye she saw that he knew it anyway.They were so close together that they looked like one person.For a while, Andrea did not realise that they had reached the Halls.

'Thank you,' she said softly.'I've never had such a wonderful evening.'

Remus smiled then, and hugged her.'Good night.'

'Good night.'

She went up the stairs to her flat at the top of the building and unlocked the door.Crossing to the window, she could see him half in shadow, gazing up.His eye found her and she blew him a kiss.He was so unutterably beautiful, she thought, her mind's eye filling in the details of his face that she could not see.After a moment he turned to go.Only when he was out of sight did she realise she still had his cloak around her.

~

'I wasn't expecting there to be so _many_,' said Andrea, sinking into a chair after the last person had left with their bottle of the Wolfsbane Potion.

They had spent the week in and out of each other's flats, working and talking together at every conceivable opportunity.Catherine Lewis had been forced to correct some of her more foolish mistakes she had made when thinking of Remus, and some of the younger nurses and doctors had teased her gently about her 'young man.'She had laughed at them all.Minerva, who had come down to see her about something, had been surprised by how much happier and brighter she was.It was as if she had been unlit before; now there was a flame burning in her.

'Oh, every werewolf who possibly could be was there,' replied Remus, sitting opposite.'Who wouldn't be?'

'Yes, of course, but still – I had thought there'd be about ten, and almost forty people showed up.'

'The Wolfsbane Potion is one of the most incredible inventions any of us could have imagined.You'll change a lot of lives, Dr Andrea Wood.' 

She smiled, and then her expression turned thoughtful and sad.'It wasn't easy this afternoon.There was a lady with her little son – he couldn't have been more than six, he'd just been bitten – and she was in floods of tears.She'd been hoping the Wolfsbane Potion would be a cure, that I'd magically be able to fix everything.But I couldn't, and I can't see any kind of cure being developed soon.'

Remus hesitated, and then said, 'Well, as a matter of fact, there are two ways of curing a werewolf bite.'

'_What?_'

'Neither of them are any use.The first is that if you bite thirteen people in a single night, you'll be cured.Only one person in history has ever done it, and his name is one of the most hated.The other is equally impossible.'

Andrea looked at his face.'What is it?'

'If someone … willingly lets themselves be bitten, they say, the werewolf will be cured.Of course, the other person will then become a werewolf.'Remus looked at the ground.

Andrea gazed across at him.He was so dear, so precious.She cast away the dark thought of the werewolf's teeth, and saw instead an image of Remus, racked with the pain of transformation.To spare him that …

'I would be willing,' she said, very quietly, her eyes fixed on his.

He took a long breath.'No!Andrea, do you really think I'd let you bear my pain for me?'His voice was very intense.'Do you think I'd make you suffer just to relieve myself?Never, Andrea, I'd never ask that of you, or of anyone.'He swallowed, and she saw he was close to tears.

'Oh, Remus….' She reached across and put her arms around him.For a few moments he struggled with his tears, and Andrea held him close.She cupped his chin in her hands and dried his eyes with two kisses.He smiled up at her then, his stormy face at peace.

TO BE CONTINUED

Facing your fears is one of the hardest things to do.Again, all my thanks to CLS for showing me that this was the direction I needed to take in this story.

_ _

_The last part will be done quickly.It was the first thing I wrote of this story (starting back to front, I know), so it just needs some re-touching.Title: et in Arcadia ego.All explanations/translations come later._

_ _

_Thank you for all the nice reviews, everyone._

_ _

_Blaise._

_19th March 2000_


	7. et in Arcadia ego

#### et in Arcadia ego

_It means, 'I am even in Arcadia,' but the interpretation is disputed._

_Arcadia is a place in rural Greece which is synonymous with paradise. More explanations at the end._

~

Andrea found herself walking home with Remus, almost without realising it.They had spent the entire day together, talking.During the morning they had worked in the League house in Mill Road until the Potters arrived to take over, and in the afternoon they sat together talking in a café, and later in Andrea's office at the Halls.If there had been an emergency, she thought, they probably wouldn't have noticed.They went into Remus' neat, almost stark flat, and Andrea sat down on the sofa.

'Have you still got some of the Potion left?' she asked, seeing that the sky was growing dark.

Remus nodded.'You gave me the right amount.'

'Well, you should take it.'

Getting up, he reached onto the top shelf of the cupboard and picked up a bottle.Carefully, he poured the contents into a goblet.He made a face as he sipped at the murky liquid.

'Can't you do anything about the taste?'

'I've tried, but it never works out.Once it blew up all over the lab.Took me all day to clear it up, and it ate into the silver tools.And I'm not changing it again, not after last time.'

Remus laughed, but leaned on the table with a small sigh.

'You should go lie down, you're exhausted,' said Andrea, getting up again.She crossed the room and put an arm about his waist.Though he was bone-weary from the rising full moon, he embraced her warmly.

'You and your tricks.Go on, go lie down,' she said, disentangling herself from his grasp, but her tone was fond.

'Are you leaving now?' he asked.There was an undercurrent of tension in his voice.Andrea glanced through the window and knew that the moon would rise soon.

'Do you want me to go?'

He hesitated.'Would you – stay a little longer?'

Andrea took a deep breath, knowing what he was asking of her.He seemed to know it as well, for his eyes were very bright and fixed intently on her.

'I'll stay.I only have to be at the League office at nine.James and Lily are taking care of things until then.'She gave him a smile, and there was only the faintest edge of nervousness to it.

'Thank you.'Remus looked as worried as she felt.She could see the tension still in his eyes.'Will you be … afraid – of me?'

'No.'Andrea spoke slowly, as if drawing the words up from deep inside her.'No.Not now.I – I used to be afraid, but not any longer.'She reached out suddenly and took his hand.'I know you won't hurt me, and I could never be afraid of you now.'As she spoke she knew in a flash of wonder, as if a cloud across her mind had lifted, that it was the truth.She smiled suddenly.'You know why?'

Remus looked at her, a gleam of joy illuminating his face.

'Because I love you.'

'Oh, Andrea …' he breathed, and he pulled her towards him.His voice was very intense.'I'd do anything for you, anything in the world.'

She looked at him with shining eyes and hoped with all her might.

'I love you,' he said, so quietly she had to strain her ears to hear.'Will you – will you stay with me forever, and be my wife?'

Her hand tightened around his.

'Oh, Remus, you know I will.'

He started to say something incoherently, but he himself did not know what it was.With a loving smile, Andrea slid her arms around his neck and stifled his voice with a kiss. 

They only broke apart when Remus' legs began to shake.'Sweetheart, you are worn out.Come on.'Andrea went through to his room with him, her arm around his waist.She could tell that he was trying not to lean heavily upon her, and she tightened her grip.He sank onto the bed, and she sat down beside him.

'Are you sure you don't mind – staying?' he asked worriedly.'It's not very much fun.'

'If you want me to be here, I won't go anywhere else.Besides,' she grinned at him, 'I'm going to marry you, and then I won't ever leave you alone, so you'd better get used to it.'

He couldn't help smiling back, and he slipped his arm around her.Andrea kissed him again and nestled against him comfortably.

For a while they sat together quietly, while the last of the light faded outside.A violent shudder came over Remus.She looked up at his face in alarm.'Is that…?'

He nodded, gritting his teeth.His face had lost what little colour it normally had. A shot of horror went through her as she remembered that he said the Potion made it less painful.It tore at her heart, and as his back arched in another convulsion, Andrea pulled him across her lap and tried to cradle him close, to absorb some of his torment into her own body.

His eyes reached out for hers, and he gasped for breath.

'Andrea … I love you.'Even as he spoke, his shape was changing, but Andrea did not look away or release her hold.The strange creature, her own dear Remus, half man and half wolf, gave a final shudder and the head of a giant wolf rested in her lap.

She never thought she would welcome the end of such a transformation, but she saw his pain leave him gradually and he lay more easily.She looked properly at him.He was so large, his brown-grey hair bristling along his back and his paws armed with terrible claws.Hesitantly, she reached out to him again, and touched his head with her fingertips.It was soft and smooth.She looked at him properly then and met his eye.And all at once her nervousness left her, for his eyes held the same Remus she knew, the same gentleness and the same care.

'You're really not very different,' she said aloud.'You're rather beautiful like this, you know.'She caressed his head.He could not speak, of course, but his eyes answered her more clearly than any words.

She sat with him for a while longer, sometimes speaking but mostly just holding him and letting him know she was there.Finally she looked at the clock and gave a start.

'I'm going to have to go now, Remus darling.I'll see you in the morning.'She hesitated.'After sunrise, I'm afraid.I'm on until nine in the morning.But then I'll see you.'

Remus gave her a werewolf's kiss with his rough tongue, and she stood up with a radiant smile.

'Good night, my love.'

Lying on the bed, Remus' keen ears heard Andrea's footsteps passing through the house and out the door.Her words echoed around his head._My love_.He had never believed any woman would speak thus to him, far less such a wonderful and glorious woman as she.

Not even the thought of the transformation in the morning could hurt him now._She loves me.She wants to marry me._He settled down to wait out the rest of the night.Come the morning he would see her.

~

Andrea's steps were light as she made her way to the League house in Mill Road in the light of the full moon.She felt it must be written large across her face._I'm in love.I'm engaged.Remus wants to marry me._

How odd, she thought, and how fitting that he should be a werewolf.She felt suddenly that everything was all right.She knew she could never really fear a werewolf again.They would all remind her of Remus._If someone told me, two months ago, that I would be in love with a werewolf and he'd love me, I'd have said they were insane,_ she thought._And now it's true.And it's not crazy at all._

In the entrance hall of the house she met Lily Potter, who returned her broad smile.

'You look happy,' she said.'Good news?'

'Lily, I'm engaged!' she cried, her voice trembling with delight at the words.'Remus asked me to marry him.'

Lily gave a hoot of delight.'How wonderful!'A little awkwardly, for she was in the sixth month of her pregnancy, she flung her arms around Andrea.

'I was hoping and hoping, but he never said a word until now.Lily, I'm afraid I'll wake up tomorrow and it'll have all been a dream.'

Lily gave a motherly smile.'I felt that way when James asked me.I'm so glad for you – for both of you.'

James came striding into the hall.'Ready to go home, Lily?Evening, Andrea.'

'James, Remus and Andrea are engaged.'

'About time, too.Congratulations.'He also embraced Andrea. 'How come he's not here with you now?'

'Honestly, James, you must be half asleep.Look out the window; it's the full moon,' said Lily, forestalling Andrea's reply.

'So it is.'After leaving Hogwarts, their monthly escapades had grown less frequent, especially after James and Lily's wedding.'Well, I wish you all the best, Andrea.Now, Lily, we'd better be getting home.See you around, Andrea.' 

'Bye!' called Andrea as they went arm-in-arm through the door.'And put your feet up when you get home, Lily.'The couple gave a laugh at this characteristic injunction, and went out to their broomsticks.

Inside, Andrea went up to the office and took a seat at the long table covered with the apparatus for surveillance spells, and glanced up at the array of mirrors on the wall.It was a dull job, watching these things, because most of the time nothing happened, but the Ministry wanted them watched around the clock, and it was the job of the League to keep an eye on everything.Tonight, Andrea's mind was far from the blank mirrors and scrying balls, as the clock ticked the night away.The same face floated across her vision, the same slow, shy smile, the same loving eyes.She could see him, hear his voice as she re-focussed one of the spells._Remus Lupin.Andrea Lupin._She turned the names around in her mind and closed her eyes for a moment as she felt his kiss on her mouth.She did not notice one of the mirrors flash redly.

~

Remus woke in the wolf's body just before dawn.He lay still in the corner of the room until he felt the beginnings of the change.Even the pain that swept over him like fire was not sufficient to disturb his joy._Andrea wants to marry me.Andrea wants to marry a wretch like me._He shook his aching head in disbelief and stretched out on the bed, breathing rapidly.When he felt strong enough, he got up and dressed.He looked at the clock.It was only seven.He could go over to the League house now – if he could walk so far.He straightened.Andrea loved him, he could do anything.

He suddenly remembered something.A ring!His grandmother had given him one, when he was a tiny boy, for his bride.Thinking he would find no use for it, he had put it away somewhere – but where?It was, if his memory served him correctly, exceptionally lovely.

Half an hour later, after rummaging through his old possessions, he discovered the tiny jewellery box under a heap of old socks in his bottom drawer.He opened it.The ring was as beautiful as he remembered, with its shimmering opal catching in the dawn light.Standing up, he caught a glimpse of himself in the mirror, unshaven, with a drawn, pale face and shadowed eyes.It amazed him yet again that Andrea could like him, could be attracted to him, could _love_ him.

After shaving and eating quickly, he went out to find Andrea and give her the ring.He fingered it in his pocket as he walked through the streets, smiling foolishly at complete strangers.It seemed unusually busy for so early in the morning.He turned down Mill Road, and looked in surprise at the many wizards in Ministry uniform bustling about.His eyes turned to the house where Andrea had spent the night.

It was not there.Without understanding, he stared at the heaps of rubble and the bare timbers of the roof silhouetted against the dawn sky.He did not hear himself cry out.

Then he was running down the road, pushing past the Ministry men who tried to stop him.He scrambled through the rubble into the half-ruined house, feeling like he was moving in slow motion.One of the Ministry men, recognising him, waved the others back.

'Mr Lupin, sir, you shouldn't go in there.It could come down any minute now!'Remus did not hear him for the blood pounding in his ears.Andrea, Andrea, he had to find her.Where was she?

He plunged through the house, not noticing the scrapes and bumps dealt to him by the jagged edges of stone, his terrible eyes missing no detail.Then he saw a little huddled shape in the most damaged part of the house, where the roof had been blown right off by some spell.He flung himself towards her.She was lying as if asleep.

'Andrea!' he shouted hoarsely, clutching her white-robed figure.'Andrea?'

She did not move.Feverishly, his trembling fingers sought a pulse, breathing, anything.She was perfectly still.He gave a half-choked cry and began to perform resuscitating spells, healing charms, but nothing changed.At last he seized her in his arms and pressed her against him, as if by his strength alone he could hold the life in her body.She was dead, she was dead, the only person he had ever loved, who had loved him, she was dead and he was alone… 

~

How long he stayed huddled over her body in a world that held only darkness, he never knew.Then he felt a hand grip his shoulder.

'Remus?'Dimly he recognised Sirius' voice.'Remus.You can't stay here, it's not safe.Are you all right?'He seemed to be speaking from a long way off.

'She's dead, Sirius,' he said at last, in a strange, wild tone.'Andrea's dead.' 

'I – I know.'He felt Sirius' arms pull him to his feet, and he lifted Andrea's body with him.He did not see the ground beneath him as Sirius steered him out of the building.

When they were outside, a huddle of people surrounded them, among them James and Lily.Peter was shooing other people away in a desperate attempt to be helpful.

'I'll take the body now, Mr Lupin, sir,' said one of the Ministry wizards, gently enough.Remus pressed the limp form to him.It was the centre of his world, the only thing that mattered.

Sirius looked at his friend clutching the body, and said in a croaky voice, 'Remus, let me take her.'For a second, Remus still clung to her.His face was so terrible that Sirius looked away for a second in pain.Then Remus lowered her onto the ground and knelt over her.With a feather-light touch, he closed her still-open eyes, and stared at her for a long time.He leaned forward and kissed her cold brow.The world began to grow dark and distant as he stared, and then he was falling and falling, out of the light into a black pit.

~

Sirius looked at Remus in horror as he pitched forwards, and dropped down beside him.

'Is he all right?' asked Peter nervously.

Sirius whirled around.'What do you think?' he flashed.'Does he look all right to you?'Peter quailed before the anger in his eyes.Sirius lifted Remus up with hands as gentle as his words were harsh.

Lily and James were standing by, and Lily was weeping into James' chest.He stroked her back and her long coppery hair soothingly.

'She told me … last night … that they were – they were engaged,' she said between sobs.'She was … so happy.'She looked down at Remus, and buried her face against James.Sirius held Remus closer as he heard Lily's words.

A light rain began to fall.It seemed all too appropriate to Sirius.He realised his own face was already wet.Peter was saying nervously, 'Shouldn't we go somewhere inside?'

The Ministry people were clearing up, someone had taken Andrea's body away and the ruins were being fenced off.James released Lily for a few moments to touch Sirius on the shoulder.

'He's right, let's go inside,' he said quietly.

Professor Dumbledore came over with a grim face.'I'll see to everything here,' he said wearily.'You take Remus home.'

'Okay,' answered James.He looked questioningly at Sirius holding Remus.'Apparating would be easiest, if you can.'Sirius nodded and reached for his wand.Magic wasn't easy to do if you were very distressed, but Sirius clenched his teeth and performed the Apparating spell.There was a flicker, and he was in Remus' sitting room, still holding his unconscious friend in his arms.

A moment later James and Lily appeared with a faint pop.Lily was holding Peter by the scruff of his neck, for Peter had never mastered Apparating.Sirius set Remus down across the sofa and straightened his limbs.There was a blanket over the back of a chair, and Lily draped it across him.She was still weeping quietly, and she put her head against James' shoulder.

Sirius' face was full of grief as well, not so much for Andrea as for Remus.

'He loved her so much,' he said, almost angrily.'He adored her, and I don't know what will happen to him now.'He looked at James as if he might have the answer.But James only sighed and stroked Lily's hair, encircling her with a protective arm.Sirius read his face and knew what he was thinking.

Peter was standing looking uneasy and upset.'There will be a ton of things to sort out, I know,' he said with a frown.'We ought to go and help the rest of the League and find out what actually happened.'

After any attack, the League had its work cut out trying to pick up the pieces.James paused, and then nodded his assent.

'Will he be all right?' asked Lily, looking at Remus' slumped form with worried eyes.'He won't … try to do anything, will he?'

'No, not Remus,' said James soothingly.'He has plenty of sense.And he'll sleep for a while now.'

'I think I'll stay a bit longer, if you lot think you can manage,' said Sirius.'I don't want him to be on his own when he wakes up.'

'That's a good idea,' replied James.'We'll manage just fine.'But his eyes were still red as he looked back at Remus, and he reached out for Lily's hand.Peter followed them from the flat. 

Alone, Sirius stared at his friend.The joyful song of a blackbird drifted in the window, and he shook his head slowly.Everything had seemed to be going so perfectly, he had been overjoyed when he saw Remus and Andrea together.How it had turned out like this, he didn't really understand.

Remus' pain seemed to be reaching out to touch him even as he slept.Sirius could feel it beating against him.He felt his anger against Voldemort grow more ferocious.Another death on to add to the score, and worse still the injury to his friend.One day we'll put an end to this, he told himself.He looked back at Remus and vowed never to forget.

~

It was raining again, large heavy drops that splattered on the faces and hands of the people in the street.Remus was walking mechanically.The only thing he could see was the long dark coffin before him.He did not speak, nor did he look at anybody else.Voices twittered softly around him, sometimes he caught snatches of what they were saying.

'Yes, he was her fiancé…'

'…poor thing…'

'She was so happy around him…'

'It was You-Know-Who, of course…'

'…poor chap, he looks dreadful.'

He heard them without really understanding, the leaden words sat heavily upon the surface of his mind.Immediately behind him were other voices, dimly familiar.

'He won't talk to anyone.I don't know what to do, he just sits there like a stone.I've tried, James has tried, _nobody_ can get anything out of him.'

'All you can do is wait.Give him time.'That deep quiet voice was Dumbledore.Not even he could make Remus feel more peaceful.He felt as though someone had taken everything from him save his ability to feel pain.

'I just want to be able to _do_ something that will help him.'

'Some things people have to do for themselves.All you can do is stay nearby.'

'You didn't think we were going to leave him alone like this?'

Remus wished they would.Oh, they meant well, but it was no help, this constant fussing over him, making him get up, coaxing him eat, trying to talk to him.And he knew somewhere that he was hurting his friends as well, and that didn't make him feel any better.

The procession left the street and went down into a garden somewhere.Remus saw every detail of the place, but took none of it in.They went to a patch of ground, and he saw that there was a hole yawning open.He wished he was going in there, where he could lie quiet and be left alone.He didn't properly see them lowering the coffin down, didn't hear the words Professor Dumbledore was speaking.Around him he could hear the sound of muffled sobbing, but he did not weep.He seemed to have lost the ability to cry.

Sirius was beside him.He murmured, 'You have to throw some earth on top.'

Remus only stared at him blankly for a moment, then bent slowly like an old man and picked up a handful of earth.It was damp and smelt strongly of rain.He dropped it on top of the coffin, and heard the thud as it hit the wooden box.It had a terribly final sound.

_It can't be real,_ he thought._She'll just come walking in and ask us what we're doing.It can't be true that I'll never see her again._

He stood, scarcely seeing, as the deep black hole in the ground was filled, and the bare earth covered with flowers.He did not notice when the mourners began to leave.A few came to give him their condolences, and he barely heard the formulaic words.James and Sirius warded them off.

Remus stood staring at the stone.He did not read the words that were freshly engraved upon it, nor did he see the phoenix emblem that was the seal of the League.He thought of Voldemort with a burst of rage.James put a hand on his shoulder.

'Are you ready to go back?' he asked softly.'Everyone else has gone, and you're soaked through.'Remus glanced up and saw that this was true.His robes were heavy with rain, but he hadn't realised until now.

'No.Leave me alone.'

James hesitated, glancing at Sirius.

'I want to be alone,' repeated Remus.'Just – go.'His voice was edged with pain and anger.James thought it best to obey, and he pulled Sirius after him.

When he was alone, Remus stood staring at the black wound in the earth for a long time.It would be so good, so much easier, he thought, to be in darkness where there would be no pain, no grief, only oblivion.Slowly, he began to walk away in the rain.He did not follow the road back to his flat.

~

In the smoky, dimly lit pub, Remus gazed down at the table.He looked at the rough wooden surface stained and marked with circles where mugs and glasses had stood.Somebody had painstakingly carved 'John loves Kathy,' in rough letters.Remus traced them with his finger.Unbidden, his mind echoed it with another set of words._Remus loves Andrea._

His glass was empty.He splashed it full from the bottle and drank it quickly.It probably wouldn't help much.Her face floated across his mind's eye, not living and happy, but the empty mask that had remained, scarcely human in its stillness and pallor.He screwed his eyes shut in a vain attempt to blot out the image.His hand was not very steady as he emptied the bottle into his glass, and he spilled a little on the table so that the engraved words were obscured.But his voice was still clear as he ordered another bottle from the barman.

'You all right there?' asked the man kindly.

'Fine.Just fine.'Remus' tone was not particularly convincing, but the barman only nodded wisely.

'Here you go, then.'He set the bottle on the table and grinned at Remus, who pulled his lips into the semblance of a smile in return.He filled his glass again and sipped it slowly, holding it between his two hands.The room was slightly distant, seeming to go in and out of focus.Good, he thought.He knew he had a poor head for drink, especially on an empty stomach, but he had never counted this a blessing until now.

He continued to sip at the glass.It did help a little, it made a barrier of sorts between him and the pain.But nothing could blot out everything, nothing short of oblivion would do that.

_Oh, Andrea, my beautiful Andrea.Where did you go?Why did you leave me here?_He sunk his head in his hands, looking at the table again, looking into blackness.

'Remus!What the hell are you doing here?'

He raised his head and turned in his chair towards the voice, making the room spin a bit.Someone was striding across the smoky pub towards him.The face came into focus.

'What are you doing here?I've been looking for you for ages!How come you vanished like that?Where have you _been_?'The questions came at him like hailstones.

'Sirius?' he said dazedly.

Sirius Black looked at him, taking in his glazed eyes, his unsteady hand and the half-empty bottle.

'Oh, Moony…'He pulled up a chair, the grating noise loud in Remus' ears.'You are in a state.'He shook his head.'Do you know how much worry you've caused?Just disappearing like that?Everybody's been looking for you all week.And then you just pop up back here like you've never been gone.Nobody's seen anything of you since – since –'

'Since her funeral,' supplied Remus in a tone so devoid of expression that Sirius flinched.He pulled his chair closer beside Remus, and put his hand on his friend's shoulder.Remus shrugged him off and looked at the wall.

'Leave me alone,' he said flatly.'All I want is to be alone.'

Sirius looked troubled.'You don't think I'm going to leave you like this, do you?Remus, I – I know how you must be feeling.'He hesitated.

'How can you?' shot Remus bitterly, before he had time to think.A moment later an image came into his head which he would rather not have remembered.Sirius in the Gryffindor common room when they were students, just after Professor McGonagall had told him of his parents' death.It had been the first and last time he had ever seen Sirius cry.Above all what he remembered was his own helplessness in the face of Sirius' grief.Helpless then as now.He covered his face with his hands for a moment.

'I do understand.I know you want to be alone, it's all I wanted, but you've been alone too long.'

He would always be alone now, Remus answered in his mind.She was gone, there was nobody else he could share his soul with.He reached out for his glass and drained it.

'I think you've had enough,' said Sirius, only half-heartedly.

'Never enough,' murmured Remus, almost inaudibly.'It still doesn't stop hurting.'He filled it again, his hand definitely unsteady now.

'Closing in five minutes, please,' called the barman.He looked across at Remus.'Will you be all right, sir?'

'I'll stay with him,' said Sirius in a reassuring tone.He rose for a minute and went to settle up.Remus put his head in his hands again.Now Sirius was going to ask him questions and make him talk, and all he wanted was to be far away from everything.Alone with his pain.It seemed to be gnawing away at his heart and his mind, so that every image he saw and every word he heard reminded him of the same thing.

'Come on, then.'Sirius put his hand on his shoulder.Remus struggled to his feet and made his way towards the door, followed by Sirius.The ground seemed to be rocking under him, throwing him a little off balance with every step.With a wry smile, Sirius took his arm.'Lucky I found you here, really.You'd have had a time getting home like this.'

'I wasn't going home,' responded Remus in a dull voice.

'No?Then what were you doing here?'

Remus did not explain that the place pulled at him like a magnet, that he had found himself walking outside the Halls of Healing this afternoon almost without knowing it, almost expecting to see her walk out the door.He had imagined it so vividly, the way she would walk up to him, her smile, her laughing words as she drove his troubles away in a second.He stumbled a little, and Sirius tightened his grip on his arm.

'Where were you going, then?' asked Sirius again.

'I don't know.'Remus suddenly felt exhausted, whether from the wine or from grief he wasn't sure.He leaned more heavily on Sirius' arm.'Somewhere I could forget for a while.'

Sirius' face was troubled.'Do you really want to forget her?'

Remus was silent for a moment, and he closed his eyes.

'Do you really?' persisted Sirius.

'Of course I don't!' Remus exploded.'I'll never forget her if I live to be a hundred, which I hope I don't.But I don't want to _feel_ anything any more.I don't want to see her funeral any more, I don't want to see her face like that.All I want is for it to stop hurting.I can't bear it any longer!'He took a long gasping breath.

Sirius stopped walking and turned to look Remus in the face.He clearly had been taking absolutely no care over himself for the past week.The light from the waning moon illuminated him and made his hollow cheeks seem darker.The traces of a beard were clear on his face, and the moonlight gave his pale face an unearthly hue.

'Moony, tell me, what have you been doing all week?' Sirius asked in a voice made sharp by his concern.'Did you spend _all_ your time in pubs like that?'

Remus tried to think.'No,' he said slowly.'I went back – to my old home in Dorset – there wasn't anyone there, but I stayed there a bit.Then I went to London – I don't really remember why.All I wanted was to get away.But – but I can't get away from her.'

'So you thought you'd try drinking your sorrows away?' asked Sirius bluntly.Remus flinched a little and nodded.

'It doesn't help,' he said wearily.'It almost makes it worse.'

He began to walk again, pulling Sirius with him.He did not go in the direction of his flat.

'Where are we headed?' asked Sirius with a frown.Then he recognised the road.'Oh.'

Remus' head felt a bit clearer now.The wind was on his face and the cold air between them had wiped away some of the fog in his mind.But his memories were sharper as well.He could do nothing to stop the kaleidoscope of images that whirled through him as he came nearer to the Halls of Healing.The funeral procession had come down this road, he could see the coffin and the black-clad mourners walking through the silent street.But he knew where he was headed now.

Cold, Remus stuck his free hand in his pocket.His fingers struck something that had fallen to the very bottom.He pulled it out, feeling light-headed again.

'What's that?' asked Sirius curiously as he saw Remus staring fixedly at something.

Remus didn't say anything as he looked at the small shining ring he held in his hand.The green opal caught the light of the moon, and he could see the warmth inside it.

'Was it – hers?'

'I was going to give it to her.'Remus spoke flatly.He was keeping himself under the tightest rein he could.Sirius made a small sound of pain that matched Remus' thoughts exactly.

He turned towards a gate in the shadow of some trees, scarcely visible unless you knew it was there.He fumbled with the catch, and pushed it open.Then he let go of Sirius' arm.He took slow, fairly steady steps through the small stand of trees and walked down towards the open piece of grassland.

A tall stone seemed to be growing out of the ground, casting a long shadow in front of it.Remus approached, and Sirius followed him.Neither of them spoke.The stone was surrounded by a mass of flowers.Remus lost his footing suddenly as the ground sloped down to the stone, and stumbled to his knees.Sirius made an alarmed noise, but seeing that Remus seemed unhurt, he said nothing else.

Remus reached out slowly to touch the stone.It was very cold and rough under his fingers.He could not make out the engravings on it in the dark, for the moon was hidden now. 

'What am I doing this for?' he asked suddenly.'She's gone.'He shook his head slowly.'She's gone.Dead.'

Sirius sat down in the grass beside him and did not know what to say.

'She was beautiful and I loved her and she's gone.'His voice was still controlled, but Sirius could hear the tension running through it like a crack in a piece of glass.'But when she needed my help, I was useless, a werewolf.All I did was hurt her, and now she's gone.'He snatched a shuddering breath.

'You didn't hurt her, Moony.You made her happy, everyone said that.She loved you as well, you're not responsible for what happened.'Remus looked at him wildly, his face contorted.

'I loved her, Sirius,' he said, and now his voice was a cry for help.'I loved her more than everything, I would have died for her, and she's gone.'His eyes blurred with tears.'Why couldn't I have died instead?Why?'Sirius put his arm around Remus' shoulders.'She said – she told me she loved me.How can she be dead?'He held the ring clasped in his hand, and hot tears ran over his face.He did not try to wipe them away, and they dripped onto the grave.It was as if a dam inside him had burst and all his pain was pouring out.

He clung to Sirius blindly.His whole body was shaken with sobs, wild and racking as if he might break apart under their strength.The torrent seemed to be carrying him along, out of the dark pit into which he had sunk.In his mind images that he could no longer hold back began to whirl around.Andrea still and lifeless in the coffin, Andrea dancing with shining eyes, flying on Altair, holding the _flora Veneris,_ looking at the stars_, I love you, I love you_…Her voice sang in his ears.

The clouds parted and moonlight fell on his face and on the stone before him.'Only love can conquer death.'It was engraved under her name, at whose instructions he could only guess.He did not know if he had said it aloud.But he knew it was true.She was gone now, gone onto the farther shore where he could not reach her, but she was here, too, in his memories.

Every day of his life he would remember her, and know that she loved him.In the end, nothing else mattered.Her laughing face rose before his mind's eye, her loving face, full of life and joy.And the kind moonlight glinted on the tears that still poured down his cheeks.

THE END

**_tendebantque manus ripae ulterioris amore_**

_(Vergil, Aeneid, VI, 314)_

_reaching out their hands to the farther shore in longing._

_ _

_ _

_'et in Arcadia ego' is inscribed on a tombstone.The 'I' is Death.Death exists even in Arcadia._

_ _

_Writing that was one of the hardest things I've done.Thank you to everyone who's still with me, I hope you got something out of reading this story.And I hope you'll review it whether you did or not._

_ _

_Blaise._

_30thMarch 2000_

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